FORUM BEHAVIOR REMINDER!!! I Lost My Temper . . .

Joined Sep 2003
9K Posts | 0+
Puerto Rico/NYC
when shortly after returning home tonight, I logged on at about 2300 hours and saw that I had a PM from one of the most senior administrators here about a simmering kettle on the Cigars Forum that might at some point begin to boil.

The following speech is The Real Deal about how to conduct yourself around here. The reason I am doing this, and doing it publicly, is because the management of AmBack/Cigar.com wish to have these forums maintained in a certain way, with a strong emphasis on something called decorum. You could also call it . . .

MANNERS!!! I am doing this before we run the risk of having certain people think that these forums are a place to run wild and strut your own image. If you are in the fleshly world a true tough guy, or you just play one on the internet, KEEP IT OUT OF HERE!!! There are other cigar related web sites for that, and you are free to join up over at those sites and continue to post here as well, or just make like a tree and leave. These choices of course, are in lieu of having the Administrators of Amback/Cigar.com just ban you outright.

I'm not speaking TO, or ABOUT any ONE member, this is a general statement to the membership going forward. If however, you believe this is about you, then read it carefully, and act accordingly. Remember this, when gentlemen enter THIS web site, you put on A Cane And A High Starched Collar. - Elvis 1961

For ladies, a loose fitting dress about two inches above the knee will suffice.

ABOVE ALL, conduct becoming DECENT, tolerant, open-minded, PATIENT human beings is HIGHLY recommended. It will be better for all of us in the long run. How many of you want to see your Moderators and Administrators participating in the passions, versus how many want to see your Moderators and Administrators POLICING the passions. Trust me, for those of you who genuinely LIKE this place, and want to see it stay around, remember that a nation is only as good as it's citizenry.

I DON'T CARE if you have 50,000 posts, and you won the Gold Medal for Most Generous Trader in Barcelona, Atlanta and Athens. When someone new walks in here and thinks he/she heard you make a disparaging remark about the block his sister lives on, you do not correct that person with a side order of your own bluster. Maybe that person had a bad day, or just felt as though they had to defend their neighborhood and family against what they felt was a callous remark.

If you really want the weight of your "seniority" to shine through, welcome that person in and go back over your post and assess the wording. If you have the STONES to mention the Bible, then hear this:

Lean in close, because I'm only going to say this once, and I'm saying it as someone who, as many others are, is full of fire and brimstone for the collective acts of man since he was put on this earth, and a staunch believer in the Bible.

Grab each one of those stones carefully, because they're VERY HEAVY you know, hoist them up way high, and CART YOUR ASS, FACE and STONES over to a mirror, and get this:

"Let he who is without sin cast the first stone."

"Before reaching into your brother's eye to pluck out the speck of dirt you see in it, get over to a mirror and check your own eyes for dirt. When you have cleaned your own eyes out, you can then see clearly enough to assist your brother."

". . . for ALLLLLLLLL have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."

"As surely as the sparks fly upward, MAN (not only new members or certain cities) is born to evil."

". . . and He will rule the nations with a rod of iron."

There's nothing there about He will rule New Orleans and Las Vegas with a rod of iron.

If you're going to play the Bible card around here, you're playing with a Moderator who is very flawed, and also in his 27th reading of the Bible. I am the Most Reprimanded Moderator, and The Moderator Most Likely To Rightfully Be Called A Loose Cannon. I also have, while not nearly as much as some others, five and a half years of posting experience on the internet, during which time I have become a STAGGERINGLY accurate detective in the arena of Potential Or Existing Trouble and Infighting On Internet Forums.

If you wind up getting banned from here, and you're Joe Hacker, you WILL keep getting banned. As long as I'm around here, I or someone else will sniff you out. Even if you have an ISP on Altair-6, and get a whole database of bogus IP addresses routed through Sweden by way of Andromeda, you WILL be sniffed out and continually banned.

If you are a "member" here, YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY!!! You have the possibility of recourse if you don't like something, but YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY!!! I, as a Moderator, have NO AUTHORITY!!! I am a SUBORDINATE here. My "authority" is limited to the power to change words or make posts disappear. I can also call the administrators' attention to certain problems. The people around here with AUTHORITY are of course, Fernando, Schmit, Mr. Speir, and Mr. Svenson etal. They are few and far between. They, and only THEY, can bite heads off.

ALL members who have lurked, then taken the time to register and post deserve RESPECT even if they may have stumbled in awkwardly, which is also a matter of opinion. All problems between members, can and should be HANDLED ON PM'S.

:duh: :duh: :duh:

Your American Back Yard is a bit over two years old. I've been here for one year and seven months. As I said, I have NO AUTHORITY, therefore NO member should act as though they do. People can hash things out even publicly with a strong sense of decorum.

What is my proof of this? EVEN REDD FOXX could make a record without a SINGLE four letter word and still leave you peeing in your pants. This guy was outrageous, ribald, vulgar, you name it, going back to a long tradition of comedians who played seedy clubs in mostly black areas, bringing a new, risque flair to the comedic realm. And YET, when he made the LP record Is Sex Here To Stay? he was hilarious, and HE, REDD FOXX, did it without saying anything that you couldn't really let a six year old girl hear.

We can do it. We at Amback/Cigar.com are only as good as our collective conduct.

I had a BAD day on Sunday. When I went to work last night, it was on very little sleep. I was looking forward to coming home and really relaxing tonight. Instead, it took nearly two hours to not really calm down all that much, and two more to compose and submit this post. I wanted to tell you all about this wonderful whiskey boutique I recently visited but instead of posting, I have been policing.

I trust this Message To The Membership will suffice. I do not believe I have been heavy handed or inappropriate in making this post. I have eaten more crow, even recently, on the internet in five and a half years, than probably any fifty of you. We have a good thing going here. Let's be good citizens.

:cop:
 
Amen Brother Bloofington. I know a good Anger Management guy when you are ready for some serious therapy. :twisted:
 
I'm not speaking TO, or ABOUT any ONE member
a lie? i would like to speak to you in a medium other than pm, im prefferably, do you have the means bloof?
 
jihiggs said:
I'm not speaking TO, or ABOUT any ONE member
a lie? i would like to speak to you in a medium other than pm, im prefferably, do you have the means bloof?

I think this is what Bloofington was referring to, if there is time to type it here, there is time for a PM. Therefor, avoiding any type of flame war.

Bloofington, as a moderator on other boards, I find this a riveting piece of prose, and take it to heart. Common sense, all of it. Yet, sometimes we all need a written reminder.

Thanks.
 
with all the rules imposed on a forum, the only one i see as paramount is the admins and mods following their own rules. its getting about knee deep in here now.
 
Personally I have always felt that NO ONE should ever act other than they would face to face.
People seem to get different behind a key board than they would in person.
We should treat people better than we wish to be treated ourselves.
But as in everyday life - everyone has a bad day.
Hell My wife and I have snapped at each other & we LOVE each other more tahn any other people on the planet - that said we always make it right - & life goes back to normal.
In every family members have words & moments, but blood/smoke
is thicker than water - so we put things behind us and grow for it!
Thanks for opening up & posting this!
CC
 
I would like to offer a public apology to the member who appeared to be the SOLE subject of my rant.

TRUST ME, all of you, ONE MEMBER HERE MAY have posted something that served as a CATALYST to my rant, but as The Colonel so wisely and perceptively noted, my rant was in fact, for general purposes. NO member who APPEARS to have been taken to task publicly, need feel that anyone will hold anything against him/her because of such a post on my part. The text below should serve as a Fair and Balanced explanation of why I posted this rant. It is a GENERAL rant, and I hope the explanation below will suffice.
_______________________


I come from a web site which barely exists anymore, but what was once the premier cigar forum on the entire internet. Things got very ugly over there in early 2001, and eventually, disintegrated completely in early 2004. We have many members from that board. These members also belong to other cigar boards. These other forums can sometimes have a tendency to allow members to "fly by the seat of their pants."

Cigar smokers sometimes have a tendency to take certain things into their own hands, and as a result, flame wars erupt and site deterioration may result. The Administrators at AmBack are very concerned about NOT seeing that sort of thing happen here, and as a result we have marching orders about running a tighter than usual ship around here.

Because of my own sometimes loose and outrageous tendencies, I myself have needed to be reprimanded, even recently, and have eaten an appropriate share of crow. I have seen posts of mine disappear and also had them edited, therefore the entire membership has seen this occur. Any ensuing "embarrassment" on my part has been quickly gotten over, because my first responsibility is to the team.

The message I posted was meant to be disseminated far and wide, and actually addressed MANY PEOPLE on the internet, and their past and present conduct. Trust me, because of the members who stepped up in support of my rant, I know for a fact it will be taken that way. No one will look at you in a funny manner because of this incident.

Cigar smokers have a tendency to duly note certain incidents and go on with their lives WITHOUT holding anything against others, no matter who they are. We may have a large influx of new members here in the near future, some of them testing the waters, after coming over from other forums. Unfortunately, cigar smokers also have a tendency to test the waters a bit too often and to overstep boundaries in an effort to display certain aspects of their character.

Here at Amback, we have received many compliments, both publicly and in private, about the way the forums are run here. Anybody looking in needs to understand that IF they join up here, certain types of conduct will not be tolerated. As I stated, because of being reprimanded recently myself, publicly as well as privately, I too needed such a reminder.

I stand by my rant posted in the wee hours. It was to point out VERY RECOGNIZABLE conduct which sometimes has a tendency to spill out on cigar posting boards. The Colonel's post in support of my rant outlines that perfectly, because he is a veteran of the web site I mentioned from years ago, and also is a staff member of another cigar forum.

I trust this will serve as a sufficient explanation for my seemingly heavy handed actions last night. Thanks to you all.
 
Hey Bloofy ... come on back and play ...

:neer: ....... :throwrock:

We all need a reminder every now and then.

After reading and posting in some local community forums in AL where the flaming gets pretty bad, I realize what a good group overall we have here. The information and fun exchanged is great. You and the others are correct, we all need to practice the good old golden rule and use some common sense. I think this is a great group and I wish that I'd have the opportunity to shake hands, sit down and have a drink and a smoke with every one of these guys whose posts make my day go by a little better.

Let's keep a good thing going.
 
Very well said Bloof...and I'm with Markus, let's here about the whiskey boutique

:cheers:
 
I will tell all about it. That's a long story, and I need a certain "mood" as accompaniment. If I am alive and healthy tomorrow, I will be returning back here to Ye Olde Hohme(Boy) Hohmestead to watch the first game of the new NFL season. I expect that the "mood" might be present tomorrow night, some time after the game, and I'm looking forward to telling about it. It's a great place and for people who are interested, either living in or visiting NYC, it's a "must see" type of place.
 
I'll drink to that :cheerschug:




No whiskey for me tho...can't stand the stuff.
 
Really? Which bourbons and ryes have you tried? Don't forget there's also Irish Whiskey, Scotch Whiskey, and now the Japanese are even making whiskey!!!
 
actually I've only tried Scotch, twice...it's too potent for me, even iced/watered down, and it makes me feel queasy. :(

I don't remember which one I tried the first time, but more recently I had the Glenfiddich.
 
Well, all the other things I mentioned are types of whiskey, so take heart, your whiskey sipping days might not be over. You just maybe haven't found the one to your liking. And if we're going to get any further into whiskey, let's take this over to the Spiritus Fermenti forums. Thanks.