Lawyer Joke - PG

Joined Aug 2004
2K Posts | 1+
How could an innocent question like "Do you know me?" end up like this?
Why Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they aren't
prepared for the answer:
In a trial, a Southern small town prosecuting attorney called his first
witness to the stand; a grandmotherly, elderly woman.??
He approached her and asked, "Mrs..Jones, do you know me?"
She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr.Williams. I've known you
since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a Big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you
never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.
Yes, I know you." The Lawyer was stunned Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones! , do you know the defense attorney?"
She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he
was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.
He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women, one of them was your wife. Yes,I know him."
The defense attorney almost died.
The judge motioned both counselors to approach the bench, and in a very quiet voice, said; "If either of you bastards asks her if she knows me,
I'll throw your sorry asses in jail for contempt."
 
From what I know of the people I grew up with who became attornies, it's all too true!!! :shock:
 
Actually, every lawyer I know is a good person, oddly enough. I have met some bastards in my time working in property management but I don't "know" them.

Pretty amusing joke though CC. Just don't go psycho_meyer on us and start posting one every day.