# My Epedeictic Speech Praising Pipe Smoking (for a class)



## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

My midterm in my rhetoric class is to present an epedeictic speech, that is one praising or blaming something. I chose to praise pipe smoking. So, here's the full text of the speech, I'd really appreciate it if you folks would read it and tell me what you think. Criticism is certainly welcomed, constructive is the preferred variety, of course.

Few symbols in our culture evoke such feelings of wisdom, calmness, and virility as the pipe. In the past the pipe was admired for its virtuous ties, ties to wisdom, patience, and fine, stout, gentlemanly values. Today, this once great object is regarded as a humorous accessory to old men and tweedy professors of the world. There is a small bastion of pipe smokers left, but we are a dying breed. Forced to find refuge amongst are cigar-smoking brethren in the ever-shrinking brick and mortar tobacco stores of the world. However, it must be recognized that the pipe is not reserved for old men and Victorian era detectives. There is now a growing base of young men (and occasionally women) who are taking up the noblest form of smoking. The cigarette, so commonplace today, is a far cry from the pipe. It represents values all-together different from its distant cousin. Smoking a pipe is not some simpleton's vice, it is, like rhetoric herself, an art.

Now, I shall address a concern that I imagine has leapt to the forefront of many of your minds: the issue of health. The anti-tobacco lobby in this country is fiercer than ever, working to vilify tobacco as the devil's poison. Do not think that I am unaware of the dangers of tobacco, any living American surely is. If one is to indulge in this gentlemanly vice (and what is life without vice), pipe smoking is surely the safest method. Unlike cigarettes, pipe smoke is meant to be tasted, not inhaled. This immediately removes the risk of lung cancer. And, while it is true that there is an elevated risk of oral cancers, many studies have shown that moderate pipe smoking, that is 2-3 bowls per day is a very negligible health risk. And if I may be so bold as to go further, there are other studies that show and an increased life length _because_ of pipe smoking. Of this I'm sure many of you are skeptical, I am not surprised. But one must remember that tobacco is not concentrated evil as some would have you believe. What accounts for this increased life range? The psychological benefits. The pipe allows one to fall out of the busy hustle and bustle of this work-a-day world and relax. It allows one to sit back and simply enjoy the day. It allows one time for introspection, and I dare say that that is something sorely lacking in our society. All in all, pipe smoking can contribute to a greater well-being. 
As I said before, pipe smoking is an art. Unlike cigarettes or cigars, pipe smoking requires a bit of practice. Anyone can take a flame to a cigar or cigarette, puff, and smoke the whole thing with ease. The pipe requires patience and ritual. There is ritual in packing, lighting, tamping, and smoking the tobacco. It is not something one can pick and master in one sitting. It takes time and persistence to learn the proper method for packing the tobacco in, for knowing when to tamp the ash and when to dump, and, most importantly of all, how to keep the pipe smoking cool and strong. What is most frightening to me, is that this requisite for the time required to smoke a pipe is seen a disadvantage by many today. It frightens me because we, as a society, are to worried about getting things done to take a little time for ourselves.

As an art smoking a pipe has a certain style to it. It gives an air of dignity to the smoker. This is partly because the pipe itself. A cigarette is some disposable piece of paper and cheap tobacco, the pipe is so much more. A good briar-wood pipe is nothing less than a functional piece of art. The curve of the shank, the grain of the wood on a smooth finish. Even the humble corncob has its own sort of country charm. A pipe possess are sort of subtle beauty to it, a beauty that appears in greater and greater force as it is used.

Albert Einstein once said, "I believe that pipe smoking contributes to a somewhat calm and objective judgment in all human affairs." In this sentence Einstein distilled the essence of pipe smoking. When one is smoking their pipe the concerns and pressures of the world melt away, leaving only the man. Because of this pipe smoking lends itself to philosophy and introspection. Great thinking can be done in the calm center of a cloud of smoke. It is no small coincidence that pipe smoking has fostered many great men. Men like Mark Twain, Jean-Paul Sartre, J.R.R. Tolkien, and, of course, Einstein himself. Today's college students are not like they once were. University's were once great bastions of academic curiosity. Places where students spoke of philosophical things and discussed great literary works, worked to unravel the mysterious of nature and searched for historical indications of what was to come. Today, colleges are the epitome of American hedonism. Far more importance is placed on perfecting one's ability to sink that last cup in beer pong than on being able to converse about the implications of The Prussian War. This is not to say that merry-making should be abandoned for academia, but surely a healthy balance must be found. A.A. Milne, the creator of Whiney the Pooh, was once quoted as saying, "At eighteen I went to Cambridge and bought two pipes in a case. In those days Greek was compulsory, but not more so than two pipes in case." As the pipe has fallen to the wayside, so has our search for higher knowledge.

In a world focused so much on getting the job done as quickly as possible, it is a tragedy now, more than ever, that the pipe has lost its prominent place. In such hectic times the pipe would prove a powerful tool for soothing the minds and spirits of people. I suppose, however, that this is not mere coincidence that the pipe is lost as it is needed most. The decline in pipe smoking parallel's the decline of the virtues such as patience and wisdom. The pipe may never find the place in our culture that it once had, but there will always be pipe smokers. Men and women who revel in good conversation amidst a cloud of lazy smoke, with the scent of latakia filling their senses.


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## Bruce (Dec 31, 1999)

Very nice!
I was recently at my Doctor's for a check up. My blood pressure has been the best it's been in 15 years.
I truly believe it's correlated to pipe smoking. It has a calming effect, and in turn, lowers BP. An excellent stress reliever!


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## ultramag (Aug 23, 2007)

I quite like it SDH. I am very much looking forward to hearing what one of our modern day college professors has to say about the speech. Please let us know how it is graded and received.


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## DubintheDam (Jun 5, 2007)

Great stuff, hear hear...now if only I can keep to 2-3 bowls a day! Good speech...should be a great success...top marks.


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## IHT (Dec 27, 2003)

nice work.


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## BigKev77 (Feb 16, 2008)

I too would like to hear your proff's, as well as your fellow students, thoughts. I thought it was great.:tu


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## dogsplayinpoker (Jan 23, 2007)

Nicely done SDH. I hope you don't get burned at the stake!


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## otto (Dec 1, 2007)

Beautiful piece, you must have smoked a few bowls writing it.


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## malinois1 (Feb 17, 2008)

Excellent speech! I fret though that it may earn you a lower grade and a bit of criticism. AT any rate please let us know how it is recieved! :tu


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## sacmore21 (Dec 8, 2007)

I enjoyed your speech and agree with many of the points. You can also add CS Lewis to famous pipe smokers. The one place that I found the speech to become a little muddled was in the discussion of colleges and their lack of being bastions of higher learning. I think you can incorporate possibly how times are different, but I wouldn't put in that they are no longer places of higher learning. I get your meaning, I would maybe just rework/reword that section. Otherwise, it looks good :tu


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Yeah, I was a little worried that that part sounded a bit like Ivory Tower-ish. I'll revise it, thanks.

Thanks to everyone else for the positive responses. I'm not too worried about being crucified for the subject matter, at least not by the professor, he really liked my outline.


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## Davetopay (Jan 19, 2008)

sacmore21 said:


> I enjoyed your speech and agree with many of the points. You can also add CS Lewis to famous pipe smokers. The one place that I found the speech to become a little muddled was in the discussion of colleges and their lack of being bastions of higher learning. I think you can incorporate possibly how times are different, but I wouldn't put in that they are no longer places of higher learning. I get your meaning, I would maybe just rework/reword that section. Otherwise, it looks good :tu


You might also take a second look at the contradiction you allow to go unanswered when you mention that pipe smoking is dying, yet there is a resurgence amongst a group of younger people.

I just hope you don't get "PC'd" out of a good grade.

GOOD LUCK!!!p ( I'll be sure and fire up a bowl of FOx & Hound to send smoke signals to the Gods to help your cause)


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Ahh, good point, I'll clarify that bit.


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## Cheeto (May 10, 2007)

Excellent work! I was sure to read it aloud just to listen how it sounds. Work really well. You put pipes in a great light without seeming fanatical or biased. I know it'll go over well!!


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## Quick_nick (Feb 10, 2008)

In my opinion you wrote a position paper not a speech. I would make it in detailed outline form not essay. The problem with a speech in the form of an essay is it's easy to lose your place when you look up, become flustered, etc. Any of my speech Prof. would have given me an a much lower grade if I read straight from a transcript. I would suggest making a detailed outline of all the key points you want to stress, and cut out the fluff (stuff that doesn't really add anything to the argument). The outline keeps you on track bu you fill in the rest from your memory. Other than that there is some good points but the format is surely doomed. If the prof. asked for this specific format then so be it, but I have no idea why they would.


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Oh I have no intention to read that paper straight, I would be done for. No, no, I intend to have an outline on note cards to help me keep my place, but that's all. I didn't want to just have an outline and make it up on the spot, though. I wrote this to memorize so I have a good fleshed out idea of what I want to say in my mind.


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## smokehouse (Jan 31, 2007)

nice work..I enjoyed reading it.:tu


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## Quick_nick (Feb 10, 2008)

Good ish.


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## tfar (Dec 27, 2007)

I am not a rhetoric prof but have taught art history at the university and studied Greek and Latin for years, so I think I get a good idea of what you are trying to accomplish.

You say, you prepared note cards with keywords. That is good. Perhaps consider a single sheet of paper instead. You don't need to hold that in your hands and don't have your hands tied up in handling the cards. You can talk with your hands, too. And it will look more professional if you can skip the cards. The speech is short, you might be able to almost memorize it.

I don't know if you have to turn in the fleshed out version of this (what you posted) to the prof. If so, have someone read the thing for you. There are enough mistakes in there to knock you down half a grade in my book.

Skip, the arbitrary reference to rhetoric as an art form. It is totally unnecessary and if you want to win brownie points it should be done in a more subtle fashion.

The bear is called Winnie, not Whiney. A small but significant change in meaning. 

I also found a good little link for you on this kind of thing:

http://www.classiclanguagearts.net/resources/materials-on-rhetoric.htm

Now to the beef. There are too many details and the point is clear but could be stronger. Are you praising or are you evaluating. If you are praising, cut out the health stuff. This only sets you up for a critical discussion. But what the epideictic speech should be about is praise. Think about the effect you want your paper to have, then work towards that effect.

There are too many little points and they don't seem to be organized in groups that one can easily remember. So you mention points but you don't make a point.

Tie the points together into groups e.g. historic pipe smoker that inspire awe, social image of pipe smoking, possible benefits of pipe smoking, why pipe smoking will always be around. Actually this order even makes sense.

I'd think of taking a pipe to class and pass it around while you speak. It is a great hook and bait to get people to connect with your subject.

Till


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## Mad Hatter (Apr 8, 2007)

tfar said:


> I am not a rhetoric prof but have taught art history at the university and studied Greek and Latin for years, so I think I get a good idea of what you are trying to accomplish.
> 
> You say, you prepared note cards with keywords. That is good. Perhaps consider a single sheet of paper instead. You don't need to hold that in your hands and don't have your hands tied up in handling the cards. You can talk with your hands, too. And it will look more professional if you can skip the cards. The speech is short, you might be able to almost memorize it.
> 
> ...


:tpd::tpd::tpd:


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Alright, single sheet of paper, check. I do intend to bring a couple pipes with me. I already cut the rhetoric mention.

About the health stuff, I'm not dropping it. I think it's important to head off that concern before the rest of the speech can be tainted by that negative predisposition. I also think it helps my arguement towards the end of that section, with the psychological benefit stuff.

Could you maybe show me where I present points but don't make a point? I'd certainly like to be able to fix that stuff.

Also, I've only got 5-7 minutes for this thing, so I can't get _too_ detailed. And I know there are various grammar errors, and the Winnie the Pooh thing, but I'm not turning it in, so it's not really a problem.


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## tfar (Dec 27, 2007)

I am glad you don't took my advice as being too harsh. :tu

Unfortunately, I can't go over the entire speech with you to sort it all out. But if you follow the grouping I suggest and stick to that you can build up a nice storyline. You can also cut the rant about what college has become or at least rewrite it. It is not directly related to pipe smoking and takes up too much space with too much detail even if the examples are nice and vivid.

The historic pipe smokers will trigger a big range of associations and garner respect for pipe smokers by deduction. Make sure those you mention are indeed well-known. I don't know how many people know Sartre but he is often pictured with a pipe. If there are people in the class who don't know Sartre you will at least show your prof that you do. So that is the good kind of attention getting; it's subtle. The creator of Winnie the Pooh might be a lesser number compared to Einstein and Sartre. Does Winnie smoke a pipe anywhere?

The social image of pipe smoking. Here you can play with the cliches and stereotypes. You do that nicely in the intro about Victorian detectives and such (make sure Holmes/Doyle was indeed Victorian). From there you can nicely transit to saying that pipe smoking is not just for image but it also has >>>

Possible benefits. Start with the benefits. Don't try to get into actual medical arguments; it's a huge minefield and you will not be able to hold your ground. What you can do is question if the benefits of the relaxing ritual might not actually outweigh the supposed drawbacks of tobacco use in the particular case of pipe smoking. This way you give pipe smoking a special position. This is good because you want to separate it from the cigarette discussion. You do that already but perhaps you are even too explicit and detailed which just sucks you into it rather than separating pipe from cigarette smoking. It can also offend cigarette smokers. There will be more cig smokers than pipe smokers in your audience, so this is a point to be aware of. You just want to suggest, not explain. Explaining and convincing takes a lot of time and it is not the goal of an epideictic speech but of a political speech (see link).

Finish up with reasons of why pipe smoking will always be around. Precisely because it is rooted and linked to all those things you just mentioned and it should be kept as a living habit of a good tradition. You can also aks some open-ended rhetoric questions here to get the audience to carry on your thought even after your speech is finished.

If you have time to post a re-write perhaps you can let us see the second and improved version. I am sure the others will have their two cents, too.

Till


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## Slow Triathlete (Jun 14, 2007)

I don't care what your professor or your classmates say.....I just respect you for standing up for something you believe in. We need more people like you.


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## Mister Moo (Sep 8, 2005)

Speeches/Public Speaking: feared more than death, they used to say. Not sure where that came from - I think some guy selling public speaking seminars made it up.

Be loose by knowing your material totally-stone-cold; loose guys use body language, hand gestures and eye contact to make their points reach home.

If possible, include an element that'll make people smile if not laff.

:2


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## squid (Oct 9, 2006)

Mister Moo said:


> Speeches/Public Speaking: feared more than death, they used to say. Not sure where that came from - I think some guy selling public speaking seminars made it up.
> 
> Be loose by knowing your material totally-stone-cold; loose guys use body language, hand gestures and eye contact to make their points reach home.
> 
> ...


If you need a good laff.....picture Mr. Moo naked! Now THAT would keep you real loose. :ss


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## Mister Moo (Sep 8, 2005)

squid said:


> If you need a good laff.....picture Mr. Moo naked! Now THAT would keep you real loose. :ss


That is SO off track! Ptui!


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## tfar (Dec 27, 2007)

Depending on how formal this is there is usually a captatio benevolentiae at the beginning and you should thank your audience for their kind attention at the end. But if this is just one presentation after the other, the prof might decide to forgo that element for the sake of brevity (which is the soul of wit - Shakespeare). If the prof didn't say anything it is better to do those things than not to do them. If anything it will set you apart positively as long as you keep it short i.e. one or two sentences at the start and one at the end.

But perhaps you already presented it... If so, how did it go? Care to show us the final version?

Having listened to hundreds of presentations and lectures and speeches I find that a well-crafted one is a real treat - like a good movie or theater play. There are super brilliant profs who cannot present (or teach for that matter) worth sh*t. And others who are less brilliant but simply captivating and they actually teach you something. I prefer to be taught by the latter kind and would hope to be perceived as the latter kind.

Till


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## paperairplane (Nov 8, 2007)

tfar said:


> ... There are super brilliant profs who cannot present (or teach for that matter) worth sh*t. And others who are less brilliant but simply captivating...
> 
> 
> > You don't have these captivating professors too often because we all bailed out after graduation and went into sales.
> ...


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## tfar (Dec 27, 2007)

paperairplane said:


> tfar said:
> 
> 
> > ... There are super brilliant profs who cannot present (or teach for that matter) worth sh*t. And others who are less brilliant but simply captivating...
> ...


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## Bridges (Jan 6, 2008)

Another pipe smoker you could add to the list is Faulkner. All my English teachers love him and his writing so it might not be a bad thing to throw his name in there.:tu

I really liked your speech. It was well put together and and made a compelling argument for pipe smoking. I might have to use pieces of it when my non-smoking friends get uppity with me.

Sounds great. Good luck.p

http://cache.viewimages.com/xc/3243...332A6E7C66BD39902B108369687ACA55A1E4F32AD3138


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Sorry being gone for a few days, school had me tied down, haven't had a chance to even peruse the forum. Anyway, I gave my speech this morning, and it went quite well. The way the grading worked was that the teacher filled out an evaluation sheet, and so did 5 of your classmates. 

I went last and right after a girl who ended up crying profusely at the end of an emotionally charged speech she gave about her father. I was not exactly thrilled about the position I was in. However, the pipe smoker prevailed! The moment I lifted my pipe, at the end of my opening line, the crowd was bemused. Grins broke out all across the class and people gave delighted laughs. The visual aid has grabbed them. I was unbelievably nervous (my legs were literally shaking) but I spoke with charisma and kept the crowd in good spirits the whole time. I can't post a finished version of my speech, since I had changed a lot of things in my mind and ran off the outline, but I think it went smashingly.

I'd like to thank you fellas for helping me get the confidence I needed and refining my speech. I'm dedicating a bowl to you gents tonight!


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## Mister Moo (Sep 8, 2005)

Bravo.

Here here.

:tu:tu


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## paperairplane (Nov 8, 2007)

Mister Moo said:


> Bravo.
> 
> Here here.
> 
> :tu:tu


Jolly good, 3 cheers and whatnot.


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## ultramag (Aug 23, 2007)

Congratulations SDH, glad it went well.


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

Hey Moo if you ever find yourself in the Greensboro are stop by the Pipe and Pint, maybe we can have a bowl. Just let me know first.


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## tfar (Dec 27, 2007)

Some Dark Holler said:


> Sorry being gone for a few days, school had me tied down, haven't had a chance to even peruse the forum. Anyway, I gave my speech this morning, and it went quite well. The way the grading worked was that the teacher filled out an evaluation sheet, and so did 5 of your classmates.
> 
> I went last and right after a girl who ended up crying profusely at the end of an emotionally charged speech she gave about her father. I was not exactly thrilled about the position I was in. However, the pipe smoker prevailed! The moment I lifted my pipe, at the end of my opening line, the crowd was bemused. Grins broke out all across the class and people gave delighted laughs. The visual aid has grabbed them. I was unbelievably nervous (my legs were literally shaking) but I spoke with charisma and kept the crowd in good spirits the whole time. I can't post a finished version of my speech, since I had changed a lot of things in my mind and ran off the outline, but I think it went smashingly.
> 
> I'd like to thank you fellas for helping me get the confidence I needed and refining my speech. I'm dedicating a bowl to you gents tonight!


Congrats, that's great. I am really glad it went well. I told you the visual aid is super important. An image says more than a thousand words, they say.

So what was the thing about her father about? How can you even give such a speech about your father?

Till


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## Cheeto (May 10, 2007)

Hey hey that's good to hear p


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## dogsplayinpoker (Jan 23, 2007)

Nicely done SDH, glad to hear they don't shoot you for speaking about smoking in public.


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## Some Dark Holler (Oct 29, 2007)

The speech about the father...eek. She basically was talking about how important he was to her, how much he had done for her, and how much she missed him (he's in NY she's in NC). The speech itself was really pretty poor, simply because she was wracked with emotion the whole time. You could see her about to cry at about 4 different points in the speech until the end when it all just came flooding out. It left the class feeling incredibly awkward. Luckily the jolly pipe smoker pulled them from that.


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