# Step by Step Guide for American's to purchase Cubans



## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Hello my fellow Americans, you're here because you'd like to know how to get your grubby little hands on cuban cigars.

Well look no further, here's the easy way to do it!

Purchase yourself a flux capacitor, I believe I saw them on amazaon and ebay, make sure it's real, not fake.

Generate 1.21 gigawatts of energy to power the capacitor.

Travel back in time to 1959 or earlier.

Enjoy said cuban cigars.


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

I saw the title and was like "oohhhnononononono, Dandidn'treadtherules,Igottawarnhim!"

Totally got me!


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## jaysalti (Apr 6, 2012)




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## fuente~fuente (May 11, 2009)

Well you also have to get to 88 mph too... :doh:


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## avitti (Jun 4, 2011)

You mean there's a way to buy Cuban cigars..who would have thunk it,lol


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## socalocmatt (Dec 22, 2010)

But how to I get Back to the Future once I'm in 1959? :banana:


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## jmj_203 (Mar 16, 2011)

Oh shat, didn't figure that part out before you went back in time did you? Now you're effin screwed, and you have to live thru the 60's & 70's again. You may have a stash of cubans but its going to suck living thru the past again.


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## socalocmatt (Dec 22, 2010)

Just gotta make sure I dont end up dating my mom or something f*ed up like that.


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## exprime8 (May 16, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Purchase yourself a flux capacitor, I believe I saw them on amazaon and ebay, make sure it's real, not fake.
> 
> .


I think I saw one at the Flea Market, I will be buying it next week!!!


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## smokin3000gt (Apr 25, 2012)

jmj_203 said:


> Oh shat, didn't figure that part out before you went back in time did you? Now you're effin screwed, and you have to live thru the 60's & 70's again. You may have a stash of cubans but its going to suck living thru the past again.


Sweet. Buy me a shit load of Google, Microsoft, and IBM stock while you're there Matt!!


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## socalocmatt (Dec 22, 2010)

smokin3000gt said:


> Sweet. Buy me a shit load of Google, Microsoft, and IBM while you're there Matt!!


LOL. No prob! I'll be sure to sell them off in '99 too :thumb:... well maybe not GOOG. Oh and mental note: "Buy a sports almanac" but DONT leave it in the car for some old grumby SOB to steal it.


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

True story: the only stocks my Grandma ever wanted to buy were in a fast-food upstart called McDonald's and a small coffee company called Starbucks, both very, very early on. Grandpa said no both times!


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## socalocmatt (Dec 22, 2010)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> True story: the only stocks my Grandma ever wanted to buy were in a fast-food upstart called McDonald's and a small coffee company called Starbucks, both very, very early on. Grandpa said no both times!


That sucks. A few years ago I got some info sent to me to buy a region for a vending machine that rented DVDs. I thought to myself, "What a lame idea. Who the hell is gonna invest in that. What if they dont return the DVD". Still kicking myself for not owning the So Cal territory of RedBox for $5K to $10K. :doh:


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## fuente~fuente (May 11, 2009)

Kinda like my family owning a lot of land in Orlando, then a fellow named Walt Disney comes into town wanting to buy up land. Of course my grandfather said yes, but he should've held out a little bit longer. He told me he still kicks himself over that one. :lol:


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## JohnnyFlake (May 31, 2006)

This method works really well. I have done it several times in the past. One truly great thing about it, is that when you get back from 1959 to the present, all the cigars you bought and brought back with you, are really well aged, and smoking beautifully!!!:biggrin:


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## CeeGar (Feb 19, 2007)

I tried to buy a Cuban once...she was not very receptive. :fish::banplease:


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

lawl


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## TonyBrooklyn (Jan 28, 2010)

hardcz said:


> Hello my fellow Americans, you're here because you'd like to know how to get your grubby little hands on cuban cigars.
> 
> Well look no further, here's the easy way to do it!
> 
> ...


ROTFLOL!:first:

Here's where to buy the capacitor!!!!!!!!:doh:

HTGuide Forum - Homebrew V1.9 Powered the Flux Capacitor! :lie:


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## shuckins (Jun 24, 2009)

better find some old bills to take with you,because folks will think the money from the present is fake...lol


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## 36Bones (Aug 18, 2011)

I just got played.........:banghead: :lol:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

For the handyman.

DIY Flux Capacitor


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## bigslowrock (May 9, 2010)

Better yet. Go back and properly store some for now. Go get them present day! 50 year old Cubans!


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## android (Feb 27, 2012)

jmj_203 said:


> Oh shat, didn't figure that part out before you went back in time did you? Now you're effin screwed, and you have to live thru the 60's & 70's again. You may have a stash of cubans but its going to suck living thru the past again.


you can make tons of money creating and selling silica gel to humidify cigars too.


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## Desertlifter (Feb 22, 2011)

Am I the only one here that thinks Buckaroo Bonzai instead of Back to the Future?


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## DanR (Nov 27, 2010)

FYI, you can buy a flux capacitor at your local auto parts store: EB Enterprises 121G - Flux Capacitor | O'Reilly Auto Parts


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## exprime8 (May 16, 2011)

DanR said:


> FYI, you can buy a flux capacitor at your local auto parts store: EB Enterprises 121G - Flux Capacitor | O'Reilly Auto Parts


Detailed Description

•Time Travel at your own RISK!!!
•Plutonium is required to properly operate Flux Capacitor.•Plutonium is used by the on-board nuclear reactor which then powers the Flux Capacitor to provide the needed 1.21 Gigawatts of Electrical Power.
•Plutonium not Available at O'Reilly Auto Parts. Please contact your local supplier.

•Flux Capacitor requires the stainless steel body of the 81-83 DeLorean DMC-12, V6 2.9L , to properly function.•Once the time machine travels at 88 mph (142 km/h), light coming from the flux capacitor pulses faster until it becomes a steady stream of light. Then, time travel begins.

•*Upgrade Kits available: Part # 121GMF.*

I wonder what the upgrade kit does!?!?!?


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## DanR (Nov 27, 2010)

exprime8 said:


> I wonder what the upgrade kit does!?!?!?


This: EB Enterprises 121GMF - Flux Capacitor | O'Reilly Auto Parts


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## jmj_203 (Mar 16, 2011)

While I'm aggravated as all hell that it takes usps 5 days to get a small 'box' across half a state to me, this thread made my day humorous as shet. Usps should invest in flux capacitors to make up for their joke of a service.


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## gasdocok (May 14, 2011)

That is G-d damn hysterical!


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## exprime8 (May 16, 2011)

I just called the store and the guy that answered the phone couldnt stop laughing when I asked how much was the flux capacitor!!!!


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

smokin3000gt said:


> Sweet. Buy me a shit load of Google, Microsoft, and IBM stock while you're there Matt!!


screw that, I'm gonna go make friends with Warren Buffet and get on the ground floor of Berkshire Hathaway.....then, I'm gonna open a little cigar shop called Cigars International and a LCdH in the Caymans and wait for you knuckleheads to give me all your cigar money


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

exprime8 said:


> Detailed Description
> 
> •Time Travel at your own RISK!!!
> •Plutonium is required to properly operate Flux Capacitor.•Plutonium is used by the on-board nuclear reactor which then powers the Flux Capacitor to provide the needed 1.21 Gigawatts of Electrical Power.
> ...


it picks up Satellite radio so you can still listen to Howard Stern while you're stuck in 1959

Pinhead Jr.: "Dude, we could start Maxim magazine and be up to our pins in chicks....or better still, we could invent silicone implants and become boob billionaires"

Herfabomber: "settle down, Hormone Boy"


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## sengjc (Nov 15, 2010)

hardcz said:


> Hello my fellow Americans, you're here because you'd like to know how to get your grubby little hands on cuban cigars.
> 
> Well look no further, here's the easy way to do it!
> 
> ...


:lol:

Don't forget the positronic emitter.

Failing which, this guy here may be able to help: STEPHEN HAWKING: How to build a time machine | Mail Online


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Bloody hell Seng! Don't go bringing Stephan Hawking into it or we may just explode whilst in transition through time. The guy knows way to much about life, the universe & everything. Oh crap, I think I just compared him to Google or Encyclopædia Britannica (Have to screw the name up or the copyright lawyers will be after me). LOL.


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## sengjc (Nov 15, 2010)

Brittanica is correct isn't it? You are not talking Bolivars here, are you?


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

sengjc said:


> Brittanica is correct isn't it? You are not talking Bolivars here, are you?


No I'm not. Now, where are we again? :wacko:








LOL


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## johnmoss (Jun 18, 2010)

As old and grumpy as Dan is I thought he was going to suggest going back and killing JFK a little earlier, before he could sign the embargo. Dan, your getting soft old man.


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## rhetorik (Jun 6, 2011)

I need a date for the Enchantment Under The Sea Dance... any takers?


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## Desertlifter (Feb 22, 2011)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> screw that, I'm gonna go make friends with Warren Buffet and get on the ground floor of Berkshire Hathaway.....then, I'm gonna open a little cigar shop called Cigars International and a LCdH in the Caymans and wait for you knuckleheads to give me all your cigar money


Jimmy Buffett. Still loaded with a net worth at nearly 1/2 billion, and better scenery where he hangs out.


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## ko4000 (May 12, 2011)

I would love to see the noobs face who googled "how to get cuban cigars in US" and search brings up a link to this thread!


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## RayJax (Mar 13, 2012)

ko4000 said:


> I would love to see the noobs face who googled "how to get cuban cigars in US" and search brings up a link to this thread!


I'm a noob to this side of Puff, although I didn't google the topic, when I first clicked on this thread I was thinking "there is no way its going to be this easy!"

I look forward to this forum though. Read up on most of the stickied threads yesterday.


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## lebz (Mar 26, 2011)

Or if you travel back in time maybe ask Kennedy for a few sticks when they were placed on his desk before he signed the embargo  I'm sure he could part with one of the 1200 sticks he bought before he signed it


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

lebz said:


> Or if you travel back in time maybe ask Kennedy for a few sticks when they were placed on his desk before he signed the embargo  I'm sure he could part with one of the 1200 sticks he bought before he signed it


What I don't understand is why he only got 1200 sticks.


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## truckertim (Sep 17, 2011)

"Purchase yourself a flux capacitor, I believe I saw them on amazaon and ebay, make sure it's real, not fake.

Generate 1.21 gigawatts of energy to power the capacitor."

You are leaving out one small detail. You need a sick ass Delorean as mode of transportation and housing unit for the Flux Capacitor.


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## rtrimbath (Sep 22, 2013)

ko4000 said:


> I would love to see the noobs face who googled "how to get cuban cigars in US" and search brings up a link to this thread!


Guilty.


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## huskers (Oct 2, 2012)




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## DBragg (Jun 13, 2013)

hardcz said:


> What I don't understand is why he only got 1200 sticks.


Just speculating but, my guess is that he didn't anticipate the embargo proceeding in perpetuity.


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