# Random List of Destruction



## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

I'm going to put a bunch of people's names in a list, go to random.org/lists, hit submit... the person at the top is going to be destroyed.


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## kozzman555 (Sep 10, 2011)

You don't have the balls to do that.


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## NovaBiscuit (Jun 14, 2012)

kozzman555 said:


> You don't have the balls to do that.


Oh snap!


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## Mr.Cam (Jun 9, 2012)

Is this another one of your tricks Dan?


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Looks like we have a winner.

There were 15 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
Timestamp: 2012-08-05 04:09:22 UTC


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## kozzman555 (Sep 10, 2011)

Yeah, but you don't have the balls to send anything out. You won't start a war with pete.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

There is no war, just destruction.


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## Shemp75 (May 26, 2012)

NovaBiscuit said:


> Oh snap!


Double snap and a fairy twist!!


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## NovaBiscuit (Jun 14, 2012)

hardcz said:


> There is no war, just destruction.


Very zen


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## exprime8 (May 16, 2011)

hardcz said:


> There is no war, just destruction.


yeah... good luck with that!!!


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## Dhughes12 (Feb 15, 2012)

This is gonna be fun to watch..... From a safe distance


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

huhuhuhhahahahahahahaha!!!

Nice knowin' ya, Dan. Nice knowin' ya.


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## Desertlifter (Feb 22, 2011)

Dan has been a bit of a rabble-rouser lately. I think he needs a hug. Pete just might be the one to do it!


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## nikonnut (Dec 4, 2011)

Have you lost your mind? Actually, you know what? Hit 'em hard!!!! This will be good. Not for you, mind you, but it will be good!


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## nikonnut (Dec 4, 2011)

Desertlifter said:


> Dan has been a bit of a rabble-rouser lately. I think he needs a hug. Pete just might be the one to do it!


I've seen Pete's hugs. Not sure that's quite how it's supposed to be done!


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## sweater88 (Jul 31, 2011)

good to see Kozz back...oh and Dan, We Lobsters love to see eachother get blown up, and love to bomb the hell out of eachother, but we have been known to protect eachother too, just sayin.....


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## Danfish98 (Jun 5, 2011)

sweater88 said:


> good to see Kozz back...oh and Dan, We Lobsters love to see eachother get blown up, and love to bomb the hell out of eachother, but we have been known to protect eachother too, just sayin.....


That's the truth. Pete won't need help to put this old guy out of his misery, but it might be funny to help him anyway.


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## lostdog13 (Jan 16, 2012)

Best of luck with that Dan. Once you hit Pete checking the mail begins to feel a little like being Barney on Slapsgiving.


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## lasix (Mar 25, 2012)

Au Revoir Dan....


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

sweater88 said:


> good to see Kozz back...oh and Dan, We Lobsters love to see eachother get blown up, and love to bomb the hell out of eachother.


I stopped reading there. I have a short attenti OOHHH SHINEY!!!!



lasix said:


> Au Revoir Dan....


I don't speak spanish.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

I got a few messages that perhaps the randomizer of death was broken....



> 20:30:20	1	nyuk nyuk	Room	hey dan i demand a recount /redo in that randomizer contest!!
> 20:31:07	1	smokin3000gt	Room	dan's randomizer = broken


So I re-ran it.

Looks like ouirknotamuzd is our new winner! Thanks everyone for bringing this miscalculation to light.

There were 15 items in your list. Here they are in random order:

ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
ouirknotamuzd
Timestamp: 2012-08-05 20:36:15 UTC


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## max gas (Apr 11, 2011)

Good luck with your plan Dan.

Can't wait to see how this pans out


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## bwhite220 (May 15, 2011)

..............."good luck" seems like a wasted thing to say in this case. Oh well!


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Looks like we have a winner.
> 
> There were 15 items in your list. Here they are in random order:
> 
> ...


I think your keyboard is broken, Dan...there's only one name on that list

heyyyyyyyyyy......wait a minute....that's my name:mad2:

Pinhead Jr.: "Dude.....save it for the Ninja's contest....eyes on the prize...eyes on the prize"

Herfabomber: "screw that.....I'm gonna randomize his body parts all over Michigan.....no, make that the entire Midwest.."

Pinhead Jr.: "well, I tried..."


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## AStateJB (Oct 13, 2011)

ound: I can't wait to see how this plays out! Glad I don't live anywhere in the general vicinity of either of you crazies!


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## Oldmso54 (Jul 31, 2010)

Sorry Dan.. My money - as always - is on Pete! hasta mannana


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)




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## DSturg369 (Apr 6, 2008)

Power in an aphrodisiac, and if you two wanna use it on each other... Well..... Hey, who am I to judge? :hug:

I'm just saying. :boink:


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## ssutton219 (Apr 17, 2007)

hmmmmm.....


Part of the Old Guard coming around and deciding to make friends and destroy homes.....



sadly its been a while Dan that these youngins seen the work of us old tymers....



Good Luck Dan-O.



The Troll


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## MontyTheMooch (May 27, 2012)

Soooooooo..... We're gonna sit here and watch Dan and Pete finger each other?


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

ssutton219 said:


> hmmmmm.....
> 
> Part of the Old Guard coming around and deciding to make friends and destroy homes.....
> 
> ...


Thanks for the support my friend, the gorilla has been stirring within, and has to be let out from time to time.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

My friends, I'm just getting started. I did promise destruction.

*It means one thing, and everything: cut.*
1 item will be shipped to Pete Nevelus by Amazon.com. Estimated delivery: Aug. 8, 2012

*Once committed to fight, cut.*
1 item will be shipped to Pete Nevelus by Amazon.com. Estimated delivery: Aug. 8, 2012

*Everything else is secondary. Cut.*
1 item will be shipped to Pete Nevelus by Amazon.com. Estimated delivery: Aug. 8, 2012

*That is your duty, your purpose, your hunger. There is no rule more important, no commitment that overrides that one. Cut*
1 item will be shipped to Pete Nevelus by Amazon.com. Estimated delivery: Aug. 8, 2012


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## ssutton219 (Apr 17, 2007)

The Troll


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## Michigan_Moose (Oct 11, 2011)

Ohh sweet you did find it on Amazon... I told you they had Antonio Bandaras Blow up dolls. Pete said that was where he got the last one.

Ohh finaly our little peter is growing up and getting hitched.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Michigan_Moose said:


> Ohh sweet you did find it on Amazon... I told you they had Antonio Bandaras Blow up dolls. Pete said that was where he got the last one.
> 
> Ohh finaly our little peter is growing up and getting hitched.


I found "The Renegade" version, hope it's OK.


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## lostdog13 (Jan 16, 2012)

anyone else hear taps playing faintly in the background while reading this thread?


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## DSturg369 (Apr 6, 2008)

http://www.texasbagpiper.com/soundclips/13 - Track 13.mp3


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Looks like the destruction will start early, as in tomorrow.....


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> My friends, I'm just getting started. I did promise destruction.
> 
> *It means one thing, and everything: cut.*
> 1 item will be shipped to Pete Nevelus by Amazon.com. Estimated delivery: Aug. 8, 2012
> ...


hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.......so it's drop shipment warfare, is it?

so be it....

the first salvo has been launched......this isn't retaliation, mind you..merely a first response

have a nice day


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Hello Kitty called, she said your costume idea is great.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

All those near Stratford CT, please seek shelter. I have confirmation that the ordnance is hot. A test fire will occur Tuesday 8/7, with a more direct salvo landing 8/8. Once confirmed that our coordinates are correct, I will bring the rain of destruction...


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> All those near Stratford CT, please seek shelter. I have confirmation that the ordnance is hot. A test fire will occur Tuesday 8/7, with a more direct salvo landing 8/8. Once confirmed that our coordinates are correct, I will bring the rain of destruction.


this Public Service Announcement has been brought to you by the Chief Operating Weasel of BOOM!!! Inc., where if the name sounds familiar, it's because they didn't think of it firstound:ound:ound:


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> this Public Service Announcement has been brought to you by the Chief Operating Weasel of BOOM!!! Inc., where if the name sounds familiar, it's because they didn't think of it firstound:ound:ound:


Hey now, I was booted from their ranks before they even became anything worth mentioning in a joke. I'm part of the grumpy old man crew.


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Hey now, I was booted from their ranks before they even became anything worth mentioning in a joke. I'm part of the grumpy old man crew.


I keep forgetting..which one is you?










ound:ound:ound:


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

I'm the guy on the right.... here's a picture from when I was younger.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

phase 1....

Tracking ID: 1ZA50W290393333178
Latest Event:	Stratford CT
Out for delivery - August 7, 2012 6:01:00 AM


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

I think those minor shots may have taken little ole pinhead out.










Don't look at me like that...










WELL....SOMEONE HAD TO DO IT!!!!!


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Don't look at me like that...
> 
> 
> 
> ...


I think he's lookin' that way 'cuz he knows something....for example:

9405510200793348408367
Priority Mail®
Processed through USPS Sort Facility
August 08, 2012, 7:49 pm
ALLEN PARK, MI 48101 
Expected Delivery By:
August 9, 2012 
Delivery Confirmation™
Depart USPS Sort Facility
August 08, 2012
SPRINGFIELD, MA 01152 
Processed at USPS Origin Sort Facility
August 08, 2012, 12:59 am
SPRINGFIELD, MA 01152 
Accepted at USPS Origin Sort Facility
August 07, 2012, 11:44 pm
ALBANY, NY 12205 
Shipment Accepted
August 07, 2012, 6:57 pm
ALBANY, NY 12205 
Electronic Shipping Info Received
August 07, 2012

:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

and I guess what's even funnier is...I'M NOT DONE YET!!!!

:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Glad to know you're still there Pinhead.... I found Pinhead Jr. for you :hat:

And now that I know you're still alive. Phase two has begun.


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Glad to know you're still there Pinhead.... I found Pinhead Jr. for you :hat:


I was wondering where the hell he was....










must've left him at the mall again when we were shopping for clothes...not the first time this has happened

Pinhead Jr.: "nope....chalk this one up to 5 times in a row"

Herfabomber: "hey, it's not my fault....how the hell am I supposed to try and find the car and keep an eye on you at the same time?"

Pinhead Jr.: "okay, World's Greatest Dad....explain how you forget all the way back from that mall in Rhode Island?"

Herfabomber: "ummmmmmm...low blood sugar?"

Pinhead Jr.: "IT WAS FREAKIN' RHODE ISLAND!!!!"

anywho...thanks, Dan....next time, just keep him

Pinhead Jr.: "hey, Mr Low blood sugar..where ya wanna forget me next time...the Mall of America?"

Herfabomber: "hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Strange.... I got this heavy box today.... something about 16 ounces of premium left overs, crammed in a bag, a few shots of sriracha, a pinch of brown sugar, and just enough WTF to make it have that unique taste/smell.

To show this herfabomber that I mean business, I'm taking his gift of surrender and torturing it.

Here you can see, I flattened the gift into tiny little pieces, and then left it to sit on a piece of paper, hoping that a paper cut would ensue.










Next, after discussing some things with a friend on the inside *you know who you are buddy* I stuffed it into this tiny pipe that's all smelly.










Finally to finish off the destruction, I applied fire....because what destroys things like fire...right?










Herfabomber... .look hard into those eyes... for this is the face of the one who will be you undoing.


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

hardcz said:


> Strange.... I got this heavy box today.... something about 16 ounces of premium left overs, crammed in a bag, a few shots of sriracha, a pinch of brown sugar, and just enough WTF to make it have that unique taste/smell.
> 
> To show this herfabomber that I mean business, I'm taking his gift of surrender and torturing it.
> 
> ...


is it just me, or did I not see you in "The Hangover"?










:biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:

enjoy that "Best of the Rest" baccy, Dan......each bag is unique, so jar it up and see how it develops.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> is it just me, or did I not see you in "The Hangover"?


I cut my hair and shaved.... guess you saw through the disguise.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Delivery estimate: Aug. 13, 2012


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

I found some numbers written on the wall in the bathroom.

Wonder what they mean...


9101901005031015868107


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## jmaloneaz (Jun 29, 2012)

Fuente Short Story? I like 'em and Grumpy Old Men too!



hardcz said:


> I'm the guy on the right.... here's a picture from when I was younger.


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## hardcz (Aug 1, 2007)

Tracking ID: 9101901005031015868107
Latest Event:	Stratford CT
Delivered - August 13, 2012 11:54:00 AM


Operation soft package has landed.

Next stage, final destruction will be ready 8/16/12. 

What is that you might be wondering. Well my friends, it's the day that the last of the ordnance is collected. Shortly after, your friend Pinhead the herfabomber will know what it's like to be on the other end of his whipping stick, a few times over.


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