# Lecturing the Troops.



## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Since all us Aussies have been yacking each others ears off, I thought it only appropriate to send a few local BOTL's a few samples of the foriegn indulgances, so as to acclimatise the troops as to what weapons the enemy may use. Oh, I lobbed another grenade over the fence as well. LMAO.:mischief: Going to QLD , SA & AL.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

lane: :mischief::clock:mg: :nono: :croc: ainkiller:


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## Magicseven (Oct 17, 2009)

Oh oh here we go again!

Man I just may have to lob more cowpies at you to teach you a lesson.


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## Dr. Nick (Jan 12, 2010)

Run!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh the huge manatee


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## jsnake (Oct 6, 2009)

WOW. Tashaz is Australia's answer to Shuckins and Smelvis.


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## Dread (Oct 16, 2009)

jsnake said:


> WOW. Tashaz is Australia's answer to Shuckins and Smelvis.


And I thought Aussies were relativly peaceful and easy going people, not the type to go out and blow up countless mailboxes


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## tobacmon (May 17, 2007)

The troops can always use a few smokes--WTG Warren.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Magicseven said:


> Oh oh here we go again!
> 
> Man I just may have to lob more cowpies at you to teach you a lesson.


They are delicious! LOL Only one left.


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## Magicseven (Oct 17, 2009)

Tashaz said:


> They are delicious! LOL Only one left.


Did you get to try one?


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Magicseven said:


> Did you get to try one?


Nope, tried two. LOL Tash likes the Badger Claws and I fought the boys off. As the sticks go, not as yet but planning on having an NC weekend. :hungry:


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## smelvis (Sep 7, 2009)

tobacmon said:


> The troops can always use a few smokes--WTG Warren.


Hey Paul
I think by troops he is trying to rally fellow Aussies in a intercontinental bombing war.

And to quote shuckins it will last until he gets slapped into the second Tuesday of next week. LOL

J/K Warren :kiss:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

smelvis said:


> Hey Paul
> I think by troops he is trying to rally fellow Aussies in a intercontinental bombing war.
> 
> *And to quote shuckins it will last until he gets slapped into the second Tuesday of next week. LOL*
> ...


Now you read my mind. I'm planning something along those lines at the moment, but then you know that. LMAO. :evil::mischief::mischief:


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## 41 ChevHead (Jan 9, 2010)

Be careful !! bombs away !!


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

What's that strange ticking sound........................


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

..........oh it was my watch, nevermind.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Monster crocodile snapped going for barra

Just oragnising my methods of transport, since the sandgropers, drop bears and kangaroos are all being utilised at the moment I am looking into new transportation techniques.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

s_vivo said:


> Monster crocodile snapped going for barra
> 
> Crikeys, i think they need a bigger tinny ! :croc:


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## tobacmon (May 17, 2007)

smelvis said:


> Hey Paul
> *I think by troops he is trying to rally fellow Aussies in a intercontinental bombing war. *
> 
> And to quote shuckins it will last until he gets slapped into the second Tuesday of next week. LOL
> ...


Thx. Dave for the assistance...I think he's using a Aussie code of sort. Now that you have decoded it, his war plans are pretty clear.We have some great American Intelligence on the guys from across the pond...........:boxing:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Stone the flamin crows Wazza, that Paul bloke might be onto something......we better have a serious captains into this situation before we're up to our necks in dingo droppings..........

You know I'm starting to think that this is possibly how the Cuban missle crisis started all those years ago??? Fidel did have a very strong arsenal at his disposal, so maybe the US getting fed up with Fidel's bombing antics and decided to change to rules and shut him down?? Maybe ?? Hmmmmm?? Well if that was the case all I can say now is you little bloody ripper, Viva the great Aussie revolution.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Stone the flamin crows Wazza, that Paul bloke might be onto something......we better have a serious captains into this situation before we're up to our necks in dingo droppings..........
> 
> You know I'm starting to think that this is possibly how the Cuban missle crisis started all those years ago??? Fidel did have a very strong arsenal at his disposal, so maybe the US getting fed up with Fidel's bombing antics and decided to change to rules and shut him down?? Maybe ?? Hmmmmm?? Well if that was the case all I can say now is you little bloody ripper, Viva the great Aussie revolution.


Onwards, Upwards & Sideways! Want to play with the Aussie Psychopath? Go right ahead I say. As Chopper said "No mate, you dont know me, but I know you". LMAO


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> Onwards, Upwards & Sideways! Want to play with the Aussie Psychopath? Go right ahead I say. As Chopper said "No mate, you dont know me, but I know you". LMAO


Uncle Chop Chop, look it's Neville effing Bartos.

Oh damn they don't know what's been unleashed now..........


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Uncle Chop Chop, look it's Neville effing Bartos.
> 
> Oh damn they don't know what's been unleashed now..........


I cant hear you, no ears an all. LOL.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> I cant hear you, no ears an all. LOL.


hopefully, this will translate correctly, :sb

i think a bit more choke and yall would have started, :z
yall have been sipping to much billy tea and have a few kangaroos loose in the paddock ! :loco:

were not a bunch of silly fannies here, might want to bite ya bum before
you pick a barney and have to check your daks ! :boxing:

thats abso-bloody-lutely the ducks guts !! oke:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

cigar loco said:


> hopefully, this will translate correctly, :sb
> 
> i think a bit more choke and yall would have started, :z
> yall have been sipping to much billy tea and have a few kangaroos loose in the paddock ! :loco:
> ...


My daks are fine Kym. Get a big black dog up ya! LMAO:kicknuts:


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> My daks are fine Kym. Get a big black dog up ya! LMAO:kicknuts:


I ass-ume thats some kind of reference to getting buggered. :hmm:

back to the dueling banjos again are we. :bolt:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

cigar loco said:


> I ass-ume thats some kind of reference to getting buggered. :hmm:
> 
> back to the dueling banjos again are we. :bolt:


ROTFLMAO. Well I'll be stuffed, ya got it. I'm sitting here like a stunned mullet trying shake me brain loose. Still trying to get my chit together after only one coffee.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

enjoy your mud mate,

I'm kicked back toking on a soprano,( my first,) well see what their about ! :smoke:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Enough banter I only have one thing to say........
Welcome to H division.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Go Scott! HaHaHa.......The party begins! Somebodies gonna get kicked. LMAO. :kicknuts:

Chopper: Im just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a
bit of torture.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Nah, no suprises with this lot warning shots only and these will be expected but what follows will not be.....

General Wazza and El Presidente' Tash, Lt Vivo reporting for duty. Haahaha, this is gonna be fun.


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## smelvis (Sep 7, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Nah, no suprises with this lot warning shots only and these will be expected but what follows will not be.....
> 
> General Wazza and El Presidente' Tash, Lt Vivo reporting for duty. Haahaha, this is gonna be fun.


Check your pm!!!


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

sounds like y'alls melons have gone walk-a-bout !! :clock:

y'all should try staying out of the sun for awile ! :drinking:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

cigar loco said:


> sounds like y'alls melons have gone walk-a-bout !! :clock:
> 
> y'all should try staying out of the sun for awile ! :drinking:


Must be why my brains fuzzy today. Them fluffy buggers in the sky are blocking out the bright spark up there.:dizzy: Either that or the tin lids are driving me nuts.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

:rain: deal with we've it had those big bloody fluffy things overhead for the last 8 weeks.................WHERE HAVE ALL THE BRIGHT SPARKS GONE, time to either commit myself or move back to WA.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

8 weeks, crickey,
heavy rain here on and off last few weeks a few beautamus days mixed in though,
cherry trees are blooming spring is close !!! :woohoo:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

:rain::rain::rain::rain::rain::rain::rain::rain:




























No complaints, just a day of sun would be nice is all.

Anyway no more off topics talk from me about rain(except the rain we're gonna be sending North) this is a bombing thread not the weather channel.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

maybe this will hold you over !!


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Nice, thanks for brightening up the place.


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## smelvis (Sep 7, 2009)

Beautiful area, the wet we here in Seattle know wet. LOL


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## southoz (Sep 13, 2009)

:focus:

Well yesterday I recieved my bombing from THE General Tashaz and what a great bomb it was!!

Thanks mate, greatly appreciated, I'll return the favour in the future.... somehow???

And i'm happy to say that you've bumped my total cigar stash to 23 :whoo:

Here are the cigars










Thanks cobber


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

smelvis said:


> Beautiful area, the wet we here in Seattle know wet. LOL


That's funny because "Seattle weather" is exactly what I've been calling it.

Nice hit, about time we started talking about cigars again in this thread j/k. That LFD Factory Press sure looks nice and also a good place to start smoking, let me know how you go.


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## smelvis (Sep 7, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> That's funny because "Seattle weather" is exactly what I've been calling it.
> 
> Nice hit, about time we started talking about cigars again in this thread j/k.


Cigars this thread is about cigars, sorry bro I misread the title I alway thought Lecturing the troops in Aussie meant catch all. :tape:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

southoz said:


> :focus:
> 
> Well yesterday I recieved my bombing from THE General Tashaz and what a great bomb it was!!
> 
> ...


Your welcome mate. Be wary of S_Vivo's comment though. That LFD has a lot of years on it & unless you like REALLY strong cigars it's gonna hurt you. You see, I was gonna use him as my test guinea pig but he's trying to lay it on you. LMAO. I heard you liked the Torano so you got one of them as well.
If you've got 23 and it worries you, speak up man. Cant have the Aussies suffering now can we. LOL.

DAVE: See, Taken behind the woodshed again eh? LMAO:mischief:


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)




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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

HeHeHe, bring it on. We are well dug in.:mischief:


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

assembly has already started,


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

recon is complete !!


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## Kevin Keith (Jan 24, 2010)

I've said it before and I'll say it again Kym...your avatar gives me nightmares! : D


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

Kevin Keith said:


> I've said it before and I'll say it again Kym...your avatar gives me nightmares! : D


come on kevin, its not that bad, everyone can use a few helping hands !!:clap2:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> HeHeHe, bring it on. We are well dug in.:mischief:


Rats of Tobruk style. :mischief:

WWRTLWF.


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## southoz (Sep 13, 2009)

Tashaz said:


> If you've got 23 and it worries you, speak up man.


No mate it doesn't worry me at all, i am thrilled to have these great sticks, not enough lumberjacks around here to cut my wood down.....

cheers

and whats all this ruckus between these yanks and us, i thought we were allies


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## southoz (Sep 13, 2009)

cigar loco said:


> recon is complete !!


i'm safe we don't have clouds down here, just sun, sun and more sun

i think your in trouble scott(s_vivo)


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Nah I should be pretty safe it's going to be a no fly zone here in another few days, just for something different it looks like more rain on the way, only difference is this time it looks like it will come in the form of a category five cyclone. Joy!


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## tobacmon (May 17, 2007)

This will be a Bloody Mess!


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## gibson_es (Jan 23, 2010)

kym, i will agree, that is a wierd ass avatar. lol.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

I actually like Kym's avatar. Helping hands. I loved Labyrinth.

Yes Paul, this is gonna end in tears. LMAO. :mischief:


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## tobacmon (May 17, 2007)

Tashaz said:


> I actually like Kym's avatar. Helping hands. I loved Labyrinth.
> 
> *Yes Paul, this is gonna end in tears. LMAO*. :mischief:


Glad to sit back and watch the Fire Works-:bawling:


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)




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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Death may watch, he knows not us, we are more venerable than he!


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha,ha :loco: :brushteeth: :bounce:

better hold on to your daks boy's !!!! oke: :clock: :hn :rip:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

I have these two, well painted. I defer to them!


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

As I was told recently "Bring the rain!"


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

and rain it shall !!!


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

ROTFLMAO....Ahhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaahaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!. *NICE!* Oh too much, losing it, arm-a-geddin out of here in case of friendly fire. LMAO


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

_Getter Done_ !!!!


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## smelvis (Sep 7, 2009)

cigar loco said:


> _Getter Done_ !!!!


Kym be nice and don't tell em that's before boot camp!


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## kRaZe15 (Jan 25, 2010)

all this bombing i don't think security is doing their jobs. but then again..... i don't think we mind their slacking off and letting those bombs get through.....


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> ROTFLMAO....Ahhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaahaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!. *NICE!* Oh too much, losing it, arm-a-geddin out of here in case of friendly fire. LMAO


"Friendly Fire", hmmmm don't give me ideas. Wait a minute, too late you can run but you cannot hide.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)




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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

I sincerely hope that none of you are responsible for this - "bringing of the rain".

RUH RO!
:behindsofa: :scared: :faint2: :faint: :beerchug: :beerchug: :new_all_coholic:

Preparations need to start immediately, clean ups and tie downs. Plus the most important thing is to ensure your fridge is weighed down correctly.
Beer is the best option for this due to its ability to rehydrate you in event of an emergency - the pub floods and you can't buy any more.
Also careful preparation must go into the required emergency planning session, generally held with close friends and neighbours these sessions are of critical importance, they are commonly referred to as a CYCLONE PARTY!!!!

Now where did I put that umbrella.

Sat Picture


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> I sincerely hope that none of you are responsible for this - "bringing of the rain".
> 
> RUH RO!
> :behindsofa: :scared: :faint2: :faint: :beerchug: :beerchug: :new_all_coholic:
> ...


Dont forget to move the BBQ indoors as well! And plenty of ice to keep the fridge weighed down as well, for when the power goes out. LMAO. Have fun mate, your gonna have to smoke indoors for a while. *G*


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

cigar loco said:


> and rain it shall !!!


Oh my, that was suppose to be a dash of roo tale and not a handful,
in that spell !!! :doh:


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## tobacmon (May 17, 2007)

YouTube - Make It Rain Lyrics


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Kym, buddy we've gotta have a serious chat. When you start messing around with Aussie bush magic you've really got to be paying attention otherwise this shit can get scary.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Kym, buddy we've gotta have a serious chat. When you start messing around with Aussie bush magic you've really got to be paying attention otherwise this shit can get scary.


Yep, Stuff up with the amount of mountain goat *****, feral pig attitude nectar and just a pinch of drop bear crap, you got trouble! A rabbid, aroused, horny, feral, dripping pig that thinks it's a goat and is extremely amorous! :dunno:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> Since all us Aussies have been yacking each others ears off, I thought it only appropriate to send a few local BOTL's a few samples of the foriegn indulgances, so as to acclimatise the troops as to what weapons the enemy may use. Oh, I lobbed another grenade over the fence as well. LMAO.:mischief: Going to QLD , SA & AL.


Yes, thankyou I am preparing for the pain or was that the rain?



s_vivo said:


> ..........oh it was my watch, nevermind.


Or was it?



Tashaz said:


> Go Scott! HaHaHa.......The party begins! Somebodies gonna get kicked. LMAO. :kicknuts:
> 
> Chopper: Im just a bloody normal bloke. A normal bloke who likes a
> bit of torture.


Why would I shoot a bloke BANG, then drive him to the bloody car and wizz him off to the hospital at a hundred miles an hour? It defeats the purpose of having shot him in the first place

Hmmmmm so more wise words from H divisions most famous graduate, Uncle Chop Chop.



Tashaz said:


> As I was told recently "Bring the rain!"


Alright NO MORE TALK OF FRIGGIN RAIN DAMMIT... Foot has been offically put down.



Tashaz said:


> ROTFLMAO....Ahhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahaaahaaaaahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!. *NICE!* Oh too much, losing it, arm-a-geddin out of here in case of friendly fire. LMAO


Oh don't you worry sir, friendly fire is this least of your worries........his name was Robert Pulson......










Chopper: Look Jimmy, if you keep stabbing me, you're going to kill me.

Ouch bro if this is anything like what the enemy may use on us I think we could be in strife. Thankyou for an awesome bomb Tash and Warren, I know it was a little bit of poor form smoking the secretos last night before even posting here to show off some pictures and thank you guys but I couldn't resist. Thanks again and I think Chopper somes this up the best,

"Look. The bloke's been me best mate since 1975. We've had our fallouts from time to time, it's no big deal. Y'know, it's like... if ya mum stabs ya, whaddya do? Y-ya don't get upset. Ya don't get angry, ya go, "Shit, mum's stabbed me, I better get off to the hospital."

8).......Prepare for Operation Mayhem.......8)


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

That Opus X is calling to me..........must resist.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

*"Why would I shoot a bloke BANG, then drive him to the bloody car and wizz him off to the hospital at a hundred miles an hour? It defeats the purpose of having shot him in the first place"*ROTFLMAO. Chopper Lives! Oh I do actually like the man. Uncle Chop Chop is a legend. He never hurt anyone that was innocent. :mrgreen::tu (Very clever Scott, I like it)


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Thanks for driving me to the hospital. :smile:


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Thanks for driving me to the hospital. :smile:


Never did it Neville! LMAO. Wasnt me. I was just standing there, minding my own business.

Even Beethoven had his critics. See if you can name three of them.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

No, I did not drive him to the hospital! Do I look like Mother Teresa to you?


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

There are a few obscure theories as to how I got my nickname, some reckon it is from an old cartoon, some say it is because I use to cut off the toes of others, while there are those that say it is because I had someone cut my ears off in jail. Maybe they are all right! Maybe they are all wrong! Who really cares.



















And that would be "Mother Fu****g Teresa" To you! LMAO.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

LMAO, absolute GOLD.


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## cigar loco (Jan 21, 2010)

tobacmon said:


> YouTube - Currency Ft.Lil Wayne -Where Da Cash At (Make It Rain Remix)
> 
> YouTube - Make It Rain Lyrics


Look at Paul pimp'in lil Wayne,:banana:

who knew, he's so fly !!:whoo:

whats this talk about aussie bush, goat-pig *****'s, and drop bear dung ?:ask:
another B&M ya'll've been shopping at maybe,









Bing Video: Godsmack- Voodoo

or, to much time in the garage stiff'in ether fumes !! ainkiller:


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## Kevin Keith (Jan 24, 2010)

Tashaz said:


> Never did it Neville! LMAO. Wasnt me. I was just standing there, minding my own business.
> 
> Even Beethoven had his critics. See if you can name three of them.


Right, what's all this then?


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Just random quotes from an infamous Aussie legend.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Hey Warren I forgot to ask for a list of these smokes, I know what some are but not others. Any chance of getting the 411?
Cheers Bloke.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Hey Warren I forgot to ask for a list of these smokes, I know what some are but not others. Any chance of getting the 411?
> Cheers Bloke.


The ones I sent you I assume?
Opus x Perfection #5
LFD Factory Press (100Ct Chest)
H. Upmann Magnum 46 Tubo
Cohiba Maduro5 Secretos
Padilla Miami Torpedo.


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Ahhh, it's a Padilla Miami Torpedo. 
Wait a minute a 100ct CHEST??? I didn't even know such a thing existed. Better put one of those down on my christmas list. So have you actually got a chest of those things? If you do that's a whole lotta pain.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

s_vivo said:


> Ahhh, it's a Padilla Miami Torpedo.
> Wait a minute a 100ct CHEST??? I didn't even know such a thing existed. Better put one of those down on my christmas list. So have you actually got a chest of those things? If you do that's a whole lotta pain.


LMAO...No I bought 10 from HavanJohn in the WTS section. Was gonna buy 5 but he cut me a sweet deal on the 10. The pain was his but he obviously enjoyed them as he only had 48 left at the time of sale. I'm not sure that these are even available in a chest anymore.


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

And for no reason but to let a brother try something he hasnt tried yet, an Express post Satchel left for Melbourne this afternoon....LOL......:mischief:


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Uh OH!!
This is going to be interesting. Prepare for first strike in Project Mayhem...ZY551967


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## s_vivo (Jan 31, 2010)

Now whatever happened to that satchel??


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## Mante (Dec 25, 2009)

Benji got it, he's just shy methinks. LOL. Nah, Ben explained he didnt know WTF was happening with bombs so leave him be. See here www.cigarforums.net/forums/vb/general-cigar-discussion/268147-i-wrong-glad-so-la-flor-dominicana.html :nod::biggrin:


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