# Lucky Guy



## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Cuba every winter and they pick me up what ever I want....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft! I am so lucky to have a continious supply of Cuban cigars @ Cuban cost.
Hopefully some day you guys will be the same!
What a crock of $hit the whole deal is in the US and what a Rip off the Canadians try to charge for Cubans.
I would never even try one if I had to buy in my own country.


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## icehog3

In the words of my friend Hector Ubanga, "Hooray for you!"


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

icehog3 said:


> In the words of my friend Hector Ubanga, "Hooray for you!"


Are you being sarcastic?


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## pnoon

Tom? Sarcastic? 
Nah!


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## Cartierusm

I bet you get those Glass Top Cohibas, they are the best.


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## mr.c

wow I have them shipped to my door, tax free, for maybe 10% more than what you pay in cuba.


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

mr.c said:


> wow I have them shipped to my door, tax free, for maybe 10% more than what you pay in cuba.


What a bunch of great guys...NOT


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> What a bunch of great guys...NOT


Why dont the lot of you ki$$ my A$$


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## cigar no baka

That's not a very friendly way of responding there, watch it or you're going to end up getting vilified there.


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

cigar no baka said:


> That's not a very friendly way of responding there, watch it or you're going to end up getting vilified there.


I do not like the replies thankyou very much


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## Smell the Colors

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> What a bunch of great guys...NOT


Dude, they're giving you [email protected] because the first thing you post is a boast about getting habanos. No intro, nothing.

First unwritten rule here is you have to be able to take some [email protected]

Take it from a newbie. Go introduce yourself first. Get to know everyone. Then start boasting.


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## pnoon

o


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

Smell the Colors said:


> Dude, they're giving you [email protected] because the first thing you post is a boast about getting habanos. No intro, nothing.
> 
> First unwritten rule here is you have to be able to take some [email protected]
> 
> Take it from a newbie. Go introduce yourself first. Get to know everyone. Then start boasting.


Sorry I dont fit in to the exclusive Hoity Toity Club you guys are runnin...you must all live in New York city!


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## billysglitch

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Sorry I dont fit in to the exclusive Hoity Toity Club you guys are runnin...you must all live in New York city!


Wow I didn't realize we were "Hoity Toity" now I feel privledged to belong


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## tecnorobo

pnoon said:


> o


I'm so glad we have that smile now.

I'll have you realize I live in kansas city.
A cow town essentially. (well not really anymore but kansas is known for really three things.. wheat, cows and tornadoes)

I like habanos. 
Do I boast about having the privelage of smoking a few here and there?
Nah. They're just cigars.


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## icehog3

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft!


Bet you get a bit of that yourself.....

You come on bragging about smoking Cuban cigars like you're some f'ing bigshot....sorry you didn't get the response you wanted, everyone saying how wonderful your life must be.

Please keep it up, I will be glad to see you gone.....DING!

:bn


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## pnoon

icehog3 said:


> Bet you get a bit of that yourself.....
> 
> You come on bragging about smoking Cuban cigars like you're some f'ing bigshot....sorry you didn't get the response you wanted, everyone saying how wonderful your life must be.
> 
> Please keep it up, I will be glad to see you gone.....DING!
> 
> :bn


Tom, Are you being sarcastic again? DING!


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## icehog3

http://www.clubstogie.com/vb/showthread.php?p=205137#post205137

http://www.clubstogie.com/vb/showthread.php?p=210489#post210489


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## icehog3

pnoon said:


> Tom, Are you being sarcastic again? DING!


Nope...not my first line anyway.


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## illuminatus

For the record... it's spelled "Hoighty Toighty"... if you're gonna insult me, get it right.. Think we're stuck up? Go to some of the other boards out there, and make a first post similar to this one. They'll REALLY hand you your ass. "I do not like the replies, thank you very much" (I corrected your typos for you) Grow a thicker skin man! :BS Happens, clean it up!

The nice thing about the jungle is that it's pretty forgiving.. So maybe if you fix this and stop being proud of being an asshat







You can become a welcomed, contributing member here...If not... well... :sl

EDIT: DING!


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## tecnorobo

nice sequence of pictures mr. oompa.


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## Nely

That's a great start canuck. If you don't like it here, why the hell are you always lurking around for?(oh yeah that's right, to ask people to do you a favor and get you some Padron Fumas) Really, who do you think you are talking to? And if you don't have anything contributive to say other than to brag about your source for Cubans why don't you STFU and leave!


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## mike32312

A$$HAT gotta love that one. I bet he's lying about having friends to. :r


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## ShawnP

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Sorry I dont fit in to the exclusive Hoity Toity Club you guys are runnin...you must all live in New York city!


You are kidding me right???? What the hell is wrong with you man????

Go away, if we are not to your liking then you don't need to be here.


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## mikey202

stop fighting!!! you all are scaring me!!!I want my mommy!!!:mn ...his punishment should be to give everyone a cuban since he has such a plethera of Isoms...yes I said plethera!!!


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## cosner63

o Boy this is getting good. Really "Hoighty Toighty" good.


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## Gordon in NM

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> What a bunch of great guys...NOT


Do bugger off,

Wanker,

Gordo

Ding...


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## TypeO-

One trip during the winter doesn't sound like a continuous supply to me. Looks like you've already dropped off the board, but if you're still lurking, pay attention. I'm a newbie here. The senior BOTLs along with the rest of forum are genuinely nice guys and generous on top of that. If you can't take someone having a little fun at your expense, then maybe you need to turn off your computer. Good news is, there are a few folk on the forum who've been slapped once or twice and have jumped back on their feet to become valuable contributors to the forum. I've seen this even in my short time in the forum. You are not yet beyond redemption. The people here are not "stuck up." Far from it. Give them a chance, and they'll give you a chance.


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## kvm

illuminatus said:


> For the record... it's spelled "Hoighty Toighty"... if you're gonna insult me, get it right.. Think we're stuck up? Go to some of the other boards out there, and make a first post similar to this one. They'll REALLY hand you your ass. "I do not like the replies, thank you very much" (I corrected your typos for you) Grow a thicker skin man! :BS Happens, clean it up!
> 
> The nice thing about the jungle is that it's pretty forgiving.. So maybe if you fix this and stop being proud of being an asshat
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> You can become a welcomed, contributing member here...If not... well... :sl
> 
> EDIT: DING!


:tpd: Excellent!


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## mike32312

Can't we just all get along..
View attachment 5249
:r


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## PaulMac

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Why dont the lot of you ki$$ my A$$


so...clearly you are freakin retarded...went to school on the little yellow bus...definately in quebec (the whole cheese eating surrender monkey thing)....

ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND??
You post about how we all getting shafted then taunt us about it? and get offended when we shred you? I would bet the lowliest noob has a better cuban collection than you...I know my collection shreds the fake ass cigars yer brokeback buddy gets on a street corner for a hummer....why don't you drive your skull through the glass top on your fauxhibas and cut your carotid you assclown...
For the record, I telling yer wife on you


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## Kayak_Rat

PaulMac said:


> so...clearly you are freakin retarded...went to school on the little yellow bus...definately in quebec (the whole cheese eating surrender monkey thing)....
> 
> ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND??
> You post about how we all getting shafted then taunt us about it? and get offended when we shred you? I would bet the *lowliest noob* has a better cuban collection than you...I know my collection shreds the fake ass cigars yer brokeback buddy gets on a street corner for a hummer....why don't you drive your skull through the glass top on your fauxhibas and cut your carotid you assclown...
> For the record, I telling yer wife on you


Why are you always making fun of me. You are all a bunch of asshats.:c

:fu Go home yankee.


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## D. Generate

I could see where this was going from his first post. I think he was fishing for a reaction and he got one.


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## PaulMac

D. Generate said:


> I could see where this was going from his first post. I think he was fishing for a reaction and he got one.


took a bit to set me off...but boy did he lol
I just fulfilling my noob ambassador role


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## Neuromancer

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I do not like the replies thankyou very much


I do not like your comments, thank you very much...ding...


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## Nely

PaulMac said:


> took a bit to set me off...but boy did he lol
> I just fulfilling my noob ambassador role


Yeah, he set me off too. I think I made my first real agressive post in the jungle. I guess because a while back he requested that I go get some Fumas for him, when I looked at his profile, not a single post in all the time he had been here. Being a nice guy, I told him nicely that i did not know him, as far as I knew, maybe he couldn't be of legal age to smoke, so I invited him to participate on the board and become involved with us, to get to know him, but if this the way he is going to interact here he could take a hike. Dumb ash.


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## Puffy69

PaulMac said:


> so...clearly you are freakin retarded...went to school on the little yellow bus...definately in quebec (the whole cheese eating surrender monkey thing)....
> 
> ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND??
> You post about how we all getting shafted then taunt us about it? and get offended when we shred you? I would bet the lowliest noob has a better cuban collection than you...I know my collection shreds the fake ass cigars yer brokeback buddy gets on a street corner for a hummer....why don't you drive your skull through the glass top on your fauxhibas and cut your carotid you assclown...
> For the record, I telling yer wife on you


*YEAH!!!*


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## icehog3

I see that the CS board will only allow so many letters in your user name....that must be how the rest of your user name got cut off.

"e pole" 

:fu


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## shakespeare

Non Cubans??????? Do they exist?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

I see you A$$ bags were up late last night LOL


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## PaulMac

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I see you A$$ bags were up late last night LOL


wow, I see you already took todays stupid pill...I expect your stay here is gonna be short


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

PaulMac said:


> wow, I see you already took todays stupid pill...I expect your stay here is gonna be short


No ...I will stick around for more of your insights


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## PaulMac

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> No ...I will stick around for more of your insights


you may hope to...but do you think most of us want you to stick around insulting us?


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

PaulMac said:


> you may hope to...but do you think most of us want you to stick around insulting us?


I will lurk


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## Neuromancer

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I see you A$$ bags were up late last night LOL


Well, atm he's at -4...so the question is, how low can he go? :r


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## illuminatus

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I see you A$$ bags were up late last night LOL


ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME?! Is ANYBODY seriously that dumb? C'mon already.. grow a brainstem, or at least another brain cell to rub against the one you've already got.

EDIT: F*CKING CANUCKS! :r


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

illuminatus said:


> ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING ME?! Is ANYBODY seriously that dumb? C'mon already.. grow a brainstem, or at least another brain cell to rub against the one you've already got.
> 
> EDIT: F*CKING CANUCKS! :r


Wow someone got up on the wrong side of the tree limb LOL


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## illuminatus

Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke The Pole Every Day Because I Heart the Cock Like A Fat Kid Hearts Cake said:


> Wow someone got up on the wrong side of the tree limb LOL


OH GODDAMMIT... it's too early for this :BS... I haven't even been to bed yet... I like the username though :r :r


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

So if I pretend to be self important, arrogant ,act wealthy and try to be a snob like all of you guys, will I fit in then ?


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## illuminatus

Nobody's acting any way. I sure as hell don't act arrogant or self important or wealthy. I'll be the first to tell you that I'm a broke college kid, trying to make my way through college without incurring too much debt. As for being a snob.. well, I can't think of something that screams snobbery more than


Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke More Pole Than Those Brokeback Cowboys said:


> Hah, I get to buy habanos, and you guys do-on't.. nanny nanny boo boo! I've got the mentality of a 12 year old, and I like provoking people to get my rocks off!


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

illuminatus said:


> Nobody's acting any way. I sure as hell don't act arrogant or self important or wealthy. I'll be the first to tell you that I'm a broke college kid, trying to make my way through college without incurring too much debt. As for being a snob.. well, I can't think of something that screams snobbery more than


Well said and enjoy this lovely day my new found freinds...back to lurking


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## Neuromancer

illuminatus said:


> Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke More Pole Than Those Brokeback Cowboys said:
> 
> 
> 
> Hah, I get to buy habanos, and you guys do-on't.. nanny nanny boo boo! I've got the mentality of a 12 year old, and I like provoking people to get my rocks off!
> 
> 
> 
> Nobody's acting any way. I sure as hell don't act arrogant or self important or wealthy. I'll be the first to tell you that I'm a broke college kid, trying to make my way through college without incurring too much debt. As for being a snob.. well, I can't think of something that screams snobbery more than
Click to expand...

:mn :r


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## txmatt

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I got my head out of my A$$ after it being stuck up there all night LOL


Don't Tell, your tenure as the board's troll is coming to an end. You have given the :mn some drama for a yawn.

I would suggest instead of entertaining yourself by boasting of your glass top Fauxhibas you start the paperwork for the shoulder replacement surgery you will need in a few years. I understand the wait is long up there with the free healthcare and your perpetual self gratification is going to have its toll.

:bn


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## dayplanner

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Well said and enjoy this lovely day my new found freinds...back to lurking


:sl And you should be :bn asshat. Act like a total f'n idiot then lurk our forum? Enjoy those street cubans.


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

txmatt said:


> Don't Tell, your tenure as the board's troll is coming to an end. You have given the :mn some drama for a yawn.
> 
> I would suggest instead of entertaining yourself by boasting of your glass top Fauxhibas you instead start the paperwork for the shoulder replacement surgery you will need in a few years. I understand the wait is long up there with the free healthcare and your perpetual self gratification is going to have its toll.
> 
> :bn


Thats a good one thanks


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## Funnymantrip

I would watch out.. I hear they have a tank.


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## Da Klugs

I'm tellin... :r 

Hey no biggie. This is an internet forum centered around cigars. We smoke them. Do you? If so, chill out a lil and enjoy yourself. 

Sarcasm and irony are resplendent here. If you don't get either, it is difficult to communicate. No harm intended. Folks hang out to have fun. Either join in or become the subject thereof.


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## dayplanner

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Thats a good one thanks


 You must have some hairy palms man.....


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## ky toker

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Sorry I dont fit in to the exclusive Hoity Toity Club you guys are runnin...*you must all live in New York city*!


Dude, if you are getting boxes of cubans (& at a good price) then you are doing better than me and I'm happy for you. But don't you ever, *EVER*, insult me again like that.


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## Nely

Why is this guy still around? After insulting our members liberally this guy doesn't deserve a second chance. Ban him!


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## illuminatus

Nely said:


> Why is this guy still around? After insulting our members liberally this guy doesn't deserve a second chance. Ban him!


:tpd:

CS -->:sl <-- Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke Pole

:bn


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## Shaggy17sc

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> Sorry I dont fit in to the exclusive Hoity Toity Club you guys are runnin...you must all live in New York city!


American by birth, Southern by the grace of God.
ive never been called "hoity toity" before, but i can live with it, ive been called worse by better.

The time of forgiveness is running out. If you stop right now, and do everything you can to be a PRODUCTIVE member here, you might still stand a chance. If not, you know where the door is; Dont let it hit you in the a$$ on the way out.

P.S. You have been dinged for all the insults. That $hit dont fly.


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## PadronMe

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> So if I pretend to be self important, arrogant ,act wealthy and try to be a snob like all of you guys, will I fit in then ?


Nope. We don't like pretenders. We only want the important, arrogant, snobby and wealthy around here. Didn't you do the survey where they asked for your gross income before you joined the board.

You are an idiot.


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## Don't Tell My Wife I Smok

PadronMe said:


> Nope. We don't like pretenders. We only want the important, arrogant, snobby and wealthy around here. Didn't you do the survey where they asked for your gross income before you joined the board.
> 
> You are an idiot.


Such kind words


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## illuminatus

Don't Tell My Wife I Play the Skin Flute said:


> Such true words


yep


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## Herfzilla

Wow! I am from Mississippi and someone called me a SNOB! The Saints must be in the Superbowl 'cause hell just froze over! :r


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## shakespeare

Shouldn´t this thread be closed already????


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## dayplanner

Don't Tell My Wife I Masterbate Constantly said:


> Such kind words


I thought so too :u


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## Da Klugs

Fork in the road time..... Man or Asshat?


Make the choice. 

1. If you like our lil cigar board then maybe stop and take a deep breath... suck it up a little and .... do the "Hey I got off on the wrong foot post". The Jungle is very forgiving and we all take a little getting used to this place and its ways.

2. Continue down this path and .... well you can always find somewhere else to be offended, say and read nasty things.. but who likes that except for asshats and trollers.

What say you? Or more importantly what are you?


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## Don Fernando

great story, Don'tTell. here, have a cookie:


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## Pablo

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> No ...I will stick around for more of your insights


Doubt it.


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## ss396

lets tell his wife he smokes.


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## Don Fernando

:r :r :r :tpd:


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## Pablo

ss396 said:


> lets tell his wife he smokes.


Made me chuckle...good one!


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## rumballs

ss396 said:


> lets tell his wife he smokes.


you took the words out of my mouth.


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## PadronMe

Herfzilla said:


> Wow! I am from Mississippi and someone called me a SNOB!


:tpd:

That doesn't happen much in these parts.


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## Guest

PadronMe said:


> :tpd:
> 
> That doesn't happen much in these parts.


Only thing more assinine would be to call us Alabama folks snobs!!


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## Kayak_Rat

:tpd:



SvilleKid said:


> Only thing more assinine would be to call us Alabama folks snobs!!


You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to SvilleKid again.

Sorry bro. Us ******** gotta stick together. :al


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## SeanGAR

Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke dead skunks said:


> I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Cuba every winter and they pick me up what ever I want....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft!


You mean you can only get a limited number of boxes of cigars ... and then only in the winter ... AND you pay through the nose for gasoline and food?

You lucky little bugger, you.


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## Guest

Kayak_Rat said:


> You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to SvilleKid again.
> Sorry bro. Us ******** gotta stick together.


Gotta figure that between Alabama, Mississippi and Arkansas, we should have the market cornered (mostly). Sure, there are pockets of fellow 'neck spread across most of the US, but in terms of R/sm, I think we have them covered!!

that's *******/square mile


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## Puffy69

SeanGAR said:


> You mean you can only get a limited number of boxes of cigars ... and then only in the winter ... AND you pay through the nose for gasoline and food?
> 
> You lucky little bugger, you.


He's Got it Made huh?


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## thebiglebowski

pds said:


> Made me chuckle...good one!


he doesn't smoke, he *smoks*, remember?

cripes - i actually stay off the board for most of the morning to get a little work down, for a change, and look what happens... ?

what a chucklehead...


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## icehog3

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I see you A$$ bags were up late last night LOL


Yup...your Mom is an animal.....


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## shakespeare

icehog3 said:


> Yup...your Mom is an animal.....


Nope... his wife... just don´t tell him.... Sorry ... I couldn´t resist.


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## LasciviousXXX

icehog3 said:


> Yup...your Mom is an animal.....


HEY!!!! That's *my* line! :mn


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## Jeff

SvilleKid said:


> Only thing more assinine would be to call us Alabama folks snobs!!


Well, I have heard it said that you folks are connoisseurs of roadkill. You thumb your noses at anything with treadmarks on it.

Only joking. I know there are a million jokes about Pennsylvanians.


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## Kayak_Rat

Jeff said:


> Well, I have heard it said that you folks are connoisseurs of roadkill. You thumb your noses at anything with *treadmarks* on it. :r
> 
> Only joking. I know there are a million jokes about Pennsylvanians.


Only if it is a non-agressive tread. Why not kill and tenderize all in one?


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## (909)

I'd like to become a member of the "Hoity Toity Club" where do I send my application?


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## Smell the Colors

(909) said:


> I'd like to become a member of the "Hoity Toity Club" where do I send my application?


Funny you should ask. I'm good friends with the president of the Hoity Toity Club. If you PM me I'll get you my addy. All you have to do is send me a $50 application fee and $300 annual dues and I'll make sure he gets it.


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## txmatt

SvilleKid said:


> Gotta figure that between Alabama, Mississippi and Arkansas, we should have the market cornered (mostly). Sure, there are pockets of fellow 'neck spread across most of the US, but in terms of R/sm, I think we have them covered!!
> 
> that's *******/square mile


Garsh; you are clearly forgetting West Virginia and Kentucky! (there be un of dem der pockets of 'em east younder part of Oh-HI-er where I be bern)


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## mike32312

Ok my question is who's the Father, who's the Son and who's the Holy Ghost?:r


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## Nely

He is such a punk ash he has to hide his smokes from his wife. "uh honey, why does your breath smell like cow poo? "


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## Cartierusm

Paul, I wish there was a way to ban his IP Addy from even viewing this board...now that would be freakin' awesome.

With some of the people on this board I bet we could figure out where he lives and send him a box full of dog rockets, real dog rockets, I've got a Husky and he sure can produce.

Seriously though, hey Asshat, if you're still reading this I can't believe that this is what you actually do to amuse yourself, come on get a life, this is just pathetic. Now of course I don't blame CS members we haven't had anyone stir up the shit in a while so this was good. Gave us something to do.


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## Da Klugs

Is Necromembria illegal in the US?


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## txmatt

Da Klugs said:


> Is Necromembria illegal in the US?


Your search - Necromembria - did not match any documents.

Suggestions:

* Make sure all words are spelled correctly.
* Try different keywords.
* Try more general keywords.


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## DonJefe

ss396 said:


> lets tell his wife he smokes.


You seriously think this joker found someone who would marry him? Haven't we had our quota of crazy for the month?


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## Jeff

Da Klugs said:


> Is Necromembria illegal in the US?


In 49 of the 50 states.


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## TypeO-

Wow, I actually had some work to do today at the office and missed all the action. This went downhill real fast. I guess *Don't tell my wife I smoke [email protected]* didn't want to play nice with the hoighty toighty BOTLs here in this most arrogant jungle of ours.

Have fun lurking jerky!


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## SDmate

TypeO- said:


> Have fun lurking jerky!


 this is where he's lurkin now


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## pnoon

SDmate said:


> this is where he's lurkin now


Gee. Now how does THAT happen?


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## Neuromancer

Jeff said:


> Da Klugs said:
> 
> 
> 
> Is Necromembria illegal in the US?
> 
> 
> 
> In 49 of the 50 states.
Click to expand...

Yeah, California's the exception...the moonbeam state is the exception for just about everything...:r


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## icehog3

Lucky Guy who has put himself -40 in a hole

Emphasis on _a-hole_


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## drevim

icehog3 said:


> Lucky Guy who has put himself -40 in a hole
> 
> Emphasis on _a-hole_


Make it -41, this marks yet another first for me here. Giving out a neg. I'd missed this thread until just now, may want to try and make friends before acting like a tool.


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## cosner63

I'll make it a -42 now. What an A$$ Hat!


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## illuminatus

He is, indeed, a very large asshat.. see my photos enclosed in this thread!


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## Gordon in NM

An Epitath to the latest victim of the cruel jungle...(cue vicious hoity-toity primate grunts)

A taunting Canadian chancre
proved nought but a pitiful yanker
without a scintilla of Lowland Gorilla
contained in his left-handed spanker


Don't tell his wife please,

Gordo


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## mcgoospot

Come on guys, give this guy a break. He's just excited. After all, he gets his Cuban cigars for 1/3 what the rest of his "friends" in Canada pay for them (and about 10% MORE that certain vendors charge to ship to my door), AND, more importantly, his Hockkey team finally scored a goal in the last game after being shut out two straight by the Swiss and Finland. He's gloating and celebrating at the same time so let's cut him some slack. <Maybe he'll post again today when his Country's Curling team beats up on the Americans.:s :s :s


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## Herfzilla

Gordon in NM said:


> An Epitath to the latest victim of the cruel jungle...(cue vicious hoity-toity primate grunts)
> 
> A taunting Canadian chancre
> proved nought but a pitiful yanker
> without a scintilla of Lowland Gorilla
> contained in his left-handed spanker
> 
> 
> Don't tell his wife please,
> 
> Gordo


Very poetic! :r


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## IHT

mcgoospot said:


> Maybe he'll post again today when his Country's Curling team beats up on the Americans.:s :s :s


"curling"?? do they also have a "make up" "eyeshadow" and "lip gloss" team? where's the Alberto VO5 hot oil treatment when you need it? my mom had curlers that she'd walk around wearing, but that was the 70s... they have teams for that stuff?


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## JezterVA

I wonder if anyone's compared this pole smoker's IP addy with that of the late FPdoc?

Coincidence? Maybe not.


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## ukyfan

txmatt said:


> Garsh; you are clearly forgetting West Virginia and Kentucky! (there be un of dem der pockets of 'em east younder part of Oh-HI-er where I be bern)


Now just for the record, I happen to be from KY and am not a *******.. I is a hillbilly


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## Kayak_Rat

I'm sorry, it must suck to be in denial!!
You dont choose to be a *******, it chooses you.


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## Bubba -NJ

JezterVA said:


> I wonder if anyone's compared this pole smoker's IP addy with that of the late FPdoc?
> 
> Coincidence? Maybe not.


I was thinking the same was possible . He pulled that gag over on cigarsmokers . Maybe it is and maybe it's not . Someone needs to check the ip addy .


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## Blueface

Ding!

Make that -48.
The bell went ding from the moment that NY comment was made.
Guy is clearly into instigating and his balls get rocked from the responses his comments elicit.

The irony is his friend may be picking up fakes from Jose, just across from the factory, at reduced prices.
He, he!


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## ToddziLLa

I have nothing to say other than

DING!


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## icehog3

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok 
Young Chimp 
Last Activity: Today 03;27 PM 

Can't think of anything else "funny" to say, numbnutz?


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## cvm4

[napolean voice]Luckyyyyyyyyyyy[/napolean voice]


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## mcgoospot

And to think that I ALMOST responded to this PM from him a couple of weeks ago:

If you had the e-mail addy of the place in Spain that would be great!
I live in Ontario Canada and refuse to pay for Cubans here!
Once in a while a friend will bring some back from Cuba for me and the Padrons I smoke I order in the states and drive over to pick up...what a rip off here in Canada!
Thanks

Looks likke he's really not that Luckky of a Guy afterall.

Just a note here. I live in Buffalo, NY, just across the border from Ontario, Canada. I have many, many friends who are Canadians and can say that the number of Pricks that I've met from Canada I can count on one hand. If I ever get to meet this guy I'm confident I'll be adding to tha number.


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## IHT

no, this is not the same person/IP as fpdoc.


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## Thurm15

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Florida every winter and they pick me up Oranges and Grapefruit....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft! I am so lucky to have a continious supply of Citrus Fruits at US cost.
> Hopefully some day you guys will be the same!
> What a crock of $hit the whole deal is in the US and what a Rip off the Canadians try to charge for Oranges.
> I would never even try one if I had to buy in my own country.


OK, I was bored at work


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## ToddziLLa

IHT said:


> no, this is not the same person/IP as fpdoc.


C'mon...I thought that issue was history.


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## ju1c3r

I haven't posted anything on this board for quite some time, due to school and work.. both full time. Of course, I always have time to smoke after a hard day's work with my best friend for the night (my Habanos).

Anyways, myself being from Montreal Canada, this guy *Don't tell my wife...* is not representative of the majority folks in Canada. Yes I do know many joyks who peave me off. Just like habanos, we will get a good share of bad crops and good crops.


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## Blueface

icehog3 said:


> Don't Tell My Wife I Smok
> Young Chimp
> Last Activity: Today 03;27 PM
> 
> Can't think of anything else "funny" to say, numbnutz?


:r

Funny stuff!


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## IHT

ToddziLLa said:


> C'mon...I thought that issue was history.


IT WAS, I WAS JUST ANSWERING SOMEONE ELSES QUESTION IF IT *WAS* HIM OR NOT.
check about 5-10 posts before mine, you'll see the question.

edit - check post #110.


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## icehog3

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok 
Young Chimp 
Last Activity: Today 10:17 AM 


He just can't stop eating them!


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## ToddziLLa

IHT said:


> IT WAS, I WAS JUST ANSWERING SOMEONE ELSES QUESTION IF IT *WAS* HIM OR NOT.
> check about 5-10 posts before mine, you'll see the question.
> 
> edit - check post #110.


My apologies kind Sir.


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## CrazyFool

pnoon said:


> o


:r :r holy crap thats rich :r


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## IHT

ToddziLLa said:


> My apologies kind Sir.


not a biggie. the caps were for emphasis, not yelling.
re-read it without the harsh tone that the caps probably give to it. was just being blunt. <-- my posts come off that way sometimes.


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## partagaspete

IHT said:


> not a biggie. the caps were for emphasis, not yelling.
> re-read it without the harsh tone that the caps probably give to it. was just being blunt. <-- my posts come off that way sometimes.


Blunt...You...No way!


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## Puffy69

partagaspete said:


> Blunt...You...No way!


Did someone say Blunts...Dont smokem'...


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## ToddziLLa

IHT said:


> not a biggie. the caps were for emphasis, not yelling.
> re-read it without the harsh tone that the caps probably give to it. was just being blunt. <-- my posts come off that way sometimes.


I've learned not to read your caps text as yelling! I didn't see that post where the question was asked and no offense was taken. :w


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## ATLHARP

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Cuba every winter and they pick me up what ever I want....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft! I am so lucky to have a continious supply of Cuban cigars @ Cuban cost.
> Hopefully some day you guys will be the same!
> What a crock of $hit the whole deal is in the US and what a Rip off the Canadians try to charge for Cubans.
> I would never even try one if I had to buy in my own country.


Hey,

At least here we can get some real healthcare. Don't worry at least your government will pay for your sex change. As far as Cigars go: somebody has to smoke the Guantanameras and it might as well be you. Got that you needle-dick kanuck cork-sucker? Also for the record: Celine Dion sucks!

:fu :fu :fu :fu :fu

ATL


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## Blueface

ATLHARP said:


> Hey,
> 
> At least here we can get some real healthcare. Don't worry at least your government will pay for your sex change. As far as Cigars go: somebody has to smoke the Guantanameras and it might as well be you. Got that you needle-dick kanuck cork-sucker? Also for the record: Celine Dion sucks!
> 
> :fu :fu :fu :fu :fu
> 
> ATL


Holy Crap Andrew!
Bad hair day?
Did you leave anything out?
Actually, I think you covered it all.

I think you are in dire straits need of some Diplomatico rum and one of your favorite H. Upmann Corona Major.
Try that and call me in the morning.

P.S.
Don't Tell My Wife I Smok has taken all the fun out of this thread by not returning with some lame comebacks.
Not the same without it. Sort of like making fun of someone who is not there and doesn't know he is being made fun of.


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## Aaron

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Cuba every winter and they pick me up what ever I want....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft! I am so lucky to have a continious supply of Cuban cigars @ Cuban cost.
> Hopefully some day you guys will be the same!
> What a crock of $hit the whole deal is in the US and what a Rip off the Canadians try to charge for Cubans.
> I would never even try one if I had to buy in my own country.


:tpd:

I live near Hollywood and 3 or 4 nubile starlets take turns under my desk servicing me as I type here on Club Stogie. The weather here on a bad day never gets colder than 45 degrees Fahrenheit. We don't have to sleep with sheep for warmth or companionship, end sentences with "eh?", or wait years for "free" state-paid medical care. Our military ensures that *you* can act like a petulant teen, whining in safety about how his parents don't give him a big enough allowance.

Signed,
*Don't Tell My Wife the First Sentence of My Repl*.

We need a smiley of the little yellow-faced guy ringing a bell.

_*DING!*_


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## Blueface

Aaron said:


> :tpd:
> 
> I live near Hollywood and 3 or 4 nubile starlets take turns under my desk servicing me as I type here on Club Stogie. The weather here on a bad day never gets colder than 45 degrees Fahrenheit. We don't have to sleep with sheep for warmth or companionship, end sentences with "eh?", or wait years for "free" state-paid medical care. Our military ensures that *you* can act like a petulant teen, whining in safety about how his parents don't give him a big enough allowance.
> 
> Signed,
> *Don't Tell My Wife the First Sentence of My Repl*.
> 
> We need a smiley of the little yellow-faced guy ringing a bell.
> 
> _*DING!*_


:r :r :r :r 
The only other thing I can add is, ROTF....NGFL


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## Shaggy17sc

Aaron said:


> Blah blah blah blah blah blah, blabla blablabla :r
> *We need a smiley of the little yellow-faced guy ringing a bell.*
> 
> _*DING!*_


how bout this?


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## Andyman

icehog3 said:


> I see that the CS board will only allow so many letters in your user name....that must be how the rest of your user name got cut off.
> 
> "e pole"
> 
> :fu


That is priceless.. :r


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## IHT

actually, i think SDMATE is the lucky guy!!


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## SDmate

IHT said:


> actually, i think SDMATE is the lucky guy!!


That bloody lucky bugger...:tg


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## Neuromancer

SDmate said:


> That bloody lucky bugger...:tg


You mean that's not really you? Damn...I was gonna hit you up for a loan...


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## Smokem94

Don't Tell My Wife I Smok said:


> I live in Canada and have about three or four friends going to Cuba every winter and they pick me up what ever I want....You guys in the States are sure getting the shaft! I am so lucky to have a continious supply of Cuban cigars @ Cuban cost.
> Hopefully some day you guys will be the same!
> What a crock of $hit the whole deal is in the US and what a Rip off the Canadians try to charge for Cubans.
> I would never even try one if I had to buy in my own country.


:fu :tg :fu :tg


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## Stogiefanatic182

I believe this is the best thread I have ever read on this forum. I think Dont Tell My Wife is not around anymore because hes to busy icing his new asshole that you guys ripped him. Nicely done and yes Canada does suck, just a wanna be America with a better health plan and stupid accents.


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## etenpenny

Stogiefanatic182 said:


> just a wanna be America with a better health plan and stupid accents.


"Better" is complete opinion 
Its worse accross the board, in my opinion


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## (909)

Stogiefanatic182 said:


> I believe this is the best thread I have ever read on this forum. I think Dont Tell My Wife is not around anymore because hes to busy icing his new asshole that you guys ripped him. Nicely done and yes Canada does suck, just a wanna be America with a better health plan and stupid accents.


Whoaaaaa!!!! Dude!!!!!!

Canada sucks???

I'm Canadian (well ex-Canadian) and most of my family still live in Canada. Canada is a nice country full of fairly well mannered nice people. I am sure that we all agree that "Don't tell my wife I smoke" sucks but why does Canada suck exactly...??

Seangar my well spoken Canadian friend, where are you when I need you.


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## MadMac

Canada sucks??? I think not!!! Wake up and smell the coffee my friend. The last thing most Canadian's want to be is American. On the other hand we tend look to Americans as our brothers...........

I was trying to stay out of this discussion, but blatant statements like Stogiefanatic182's and Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke's really make me shake my head. I am embarrassed to even think Don't Tell My Wife I Smoke is a Canadian!:BS Live and learn........

my 2 cents worth.....






MadMac


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## SeanGAR

Aaron said:


> Our military ensures that *you* can act like a petulant teen..


Yeah, if it wasn't for America's big guns, St. Pierre and Miquelon would have over-run Canada completely. I mean, I can't count the number of times the Americans have come to Canada's defense. There was .... uh .... well ...... Greenpeace saved some baby seals ... does that count?


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## etenpenny

well I have to give it to canada they did hit the ground on one of the 5 landing beaches in normany on D Day 
the british and the US had two 
In my mind that sorta makes us brothers in arms of a sort

btw, does canada have much of a military anymore? (not being sarcastic here)

I think our true enemy is ..........
Oregon, as stephen Colbert says its "california's canada, and dont bother writing I dont read anything written on birch bark"


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## SeanGAR

etenpenny said:


> well I have to give it to canada they did hit the ground on one of the 5 landing beaches in normany on D Day
> the british and the US had two
> In my mind that sorta makes us brothers in arms of a sort
> 
> btw, does canada have much of a military anymore? (not being sarcastic here)


We have as much a military as we need to have.

Canadians developed the finest fighter plane in the world before 1960. 
http://www.exn.ca/flight/avro_arrow/
http://www.avroarrow.org/history.html

WW1, in trench warfare Germans feared Canadians more than anybody else. 
WW2, what was learned from Canadians at Dieppe helped make D-Day successful.

Canadians are in Afghanistan fighting with you guys. As a % of GDP we put much less into the military (1.1%) than you do (3.3%) ... but few are higher than you: Israel (8.7%), China (4.3%). There really isn't a point in spending more ... its not like you're protecting us ... we buy our own planes and fly them, but there isn't a point in spending trillions to defend ourselves against the French, is there? And since we have far fewer people, we need fewer of those $20,000 toilet seats and $3000 hammers.


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## etenpenny

SeanGAR said:


> We have as much a military as we need to have.
> 
> Canadians developed the finest fighter plane in the world before 1960.
> http://www.exn.ca/flight/avro_arrow/
> http://www.avroarrow.org/history.html
> 
> WW1, in trench warfare Germans feared Canadians more than anybody else.
> WW2, what was learned Canadians at Dieppe helped make D-Day successful.
> 
> Canadians are in Afghanistan fighting with you guys. As a % of GDP we put much less into the military (1.1%) than you do (3.3%) ... but few are higher than you: Israel (8.7%), China (4.3%). There really isn't a point in spending more ... its not like you're protecting us ... we buy our own planes and fly them, but there isn't a point in spending trillions to defend ourselves against the French, is there?


Yea I saw that about the arrow on the history channel the other day, the only problem is that the stupid president at the time scrapped development of the best fighter in the world to give money as farm subsidies
then he tuned around and bough second class old stuff from france and the US, could have become a real problem in the cold war
Sean, its almost scary that china spends a greater percent of thier GDP on the military then the US, they will be catching up technology wise pretty quick I imagine.
the only place Ive been in canada is quebec and its my opinion that canada might need something powerful to defend themselves against the crazy frenchmen there:r , some cities there were absoultly strange compared with the rest of canada


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## Gordon in NM

Gentlemen,

The Canadians invented HOCKEY!

And for that reason alone I will be forever in their debt.

C'mon guys these are our brothers. They talk a little funny but they can't help that. Let's not let this deteriorate into simple-minded neighbor bashing, we're better than that. PDTMWIS is an @sshole but that's not because he's a Canadian, it's because he's an @sshole.

Gordon in NM
Seriously mediocre right winger for the Santa Fe Bruins of the Capitol City Hockey League, USA Hockey.


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## SeanGAR

Well, China gets their technology the old fashioned way ... by stealing it. And they are a "most favored nation" for trade? Huh? Where is my FREE TIBET shirt ...

I'll bet you anything that a couple of ... er ... Chinese lobbyists sent to Bubba a few years ago have stains from .... uhm .....lobbying activities ... on their dresses to help "earn" most favored nation trade status. 

They'll be the problem in the future for sure, assuming we bomb the crap out of Iran's nuclear facilities.


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## DonWeb

Gordon in NM said:


> Gentlemen,
> 
> The Canadians invented HOCKEY!
> 
> And for that reason alone I will be forever in their debt.
> 
> C'mon guys these are our brothers. They talk a little funny but they can't help that. Let's not let this deteriorate into simple-minded neighbor bashing, we're better than that. PDTMWIS is an @sshole but that's not because he's a Canadian, it's because he's an @sshole.
> 
> Gordon in NM
> Seriously mediocre right winger for the Santa Fe Bruins of the Capitol City Hockey League, USA Hockey.


nicely put... i'm just not quite sure who the simple-minded neighbors are.


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## etenpenny

SeanGAR said:


> Well, China gets their technology the old fashioned way ... by stealing it. And they are a "most favored nation" for trade? Huh? Where is my FREE TIBET shirt ...
> 
> I'll bet you anything that a couple of ... er ... Chinese lobbyists sent to Bubba a few years ago have stains from .... uhm .....lobbying activities ... on their dresses to help "earn" most favored nation trade status.
> 
> They'll be the problem in the future for sure, assuming we bomb the crap out of Iran's nuclear facilities.


:r great stuff, you right about china, there new stealth fighter is almost identical to the F-22 system that the US paid 70 billion to develop
your right about them being a big problem
also, india seems to be modernizing real quick although they will be the US best friend for a long time to come

Elliott


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## Aaron

SeanGAR said:


> Yeah, if it wasn't for America's big guns, St. Pierre and Miquelon would have over-run Canada completely. I mean, I can't count the number of times the Americans have come to Canada's defense. There was .... uh .... well ...... Greenpeace saved some baby seals ... does that count?


Good question.

But let's play hardball, here. If the USA downgraded its military by the end of this calendar year to no more than Canada's current ability, would Canada and the rest of the world be more or less safe?

Or does Canada (as Europe) benefit not just a little from having a big brother to knock down the historically regular rise of totalitarian bullies?

History teaches us that peace lasts longest through deterrent strength. Being perceived as an ally to the dominant power has always had benefits throughout history. I think there's a solid case that anything which threatens the current Anglosphere is a bad thing not merely for the Anglosphere but for all of humanity.

Presently reading the section on the downfall of Athens in Victor Davis Hanson's _Ripples of Battle_.

SIDEBAR: Damn, SeanGAR... this kind of discussion between us really is worse online than in person over good beer and cigars where we'd certainly have more fun and pick up on the subtle and not-so-subtle hyperbole we'd tip off with our tone of voice and/or body language. I'll remind you of one of my Dad's favorite sayings to keep in mind when reading me: _If I ever fail to overstate the case, please call an ambulance._ ​


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## Aaron

SeanGAR said:


> Well, China gets their technology the old fashioned way ... by stealing it. And they are a "most favored nation" for trade? Huh? Where is my FREE TIBET shirt ...
> 
> I'll bet you anything that a couple of ... er ... Chinese lobbyists sent to Bubba a few years ago have stains from .... uhm .....lobbying activities ... on their dresses to help "earn" most favored nation trade status.
> 
> They'll be the problem in the future for sure, assuming we bomb the crap out of Iran's nuclear facilities.


I'm with you on China, SeanGAR. We need a new Jackson-Vanik amendment linking trade AND sales of military technology to Freedom House's annual rights rankings.

Did you see today's news on Newsmax on how Clinton got $300k from the UAE?

Bismarck was right... sausage and politics.


----------



## DonJefe

Saw this joker lurking and had to look up this thread. Glad I did, I haven't laughed this hard in a long time!!:r


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## dahigman

I remembered this as soon as I saw the user name. Thanks for bringing it back Jeff. It was good for a chuckle.


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## Islesfan

I love Canada for at least two reasons.....invented my favorite sport (see screen name).....

and these guys....


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## dayplanner

Islesfan said:


> I love Canada for at least two reasons.....


SeanGAR and telephones are my two reasons!

I miss DTMWIS. He was almost as much fun as kwagga


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## PadronMe

Since the rest of the board is bumping old threads.


----------



## DriftyGypsy

Must of been Kwagga's Canadien Cousin


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## Old Sailor

This guy left....his village called, said they where missing their IDIOT....:r


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## Blaylock-cl

*Troller* is looking for a response...ANY response, and he will chum the waters with complaints, insults, compliments, and inflammatory tidbits hoping that someone...ANYONE, will take the bait. Generally quite harmless - practices a form of catch and release. Nonetheless, he can upset the delicate ecology of a discussion forum. Once a forum becomes aware of his presence, however, all feeding activity ceases and Troller must move on to more promising waters.


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