# A vast web of conspiracy...



## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

I've discovered something.

A conspiracy so _vast_, one wouldn't ever guess it goes all the way to Kipp. Because no one would guess he was that smart. (He's not, but he had help from his consigliere and an evil genius.)

I think instead of bombing us, the ZK figured out a way to have us bomb ourselves, without having to directly accept responsibility or reprisal. They wanted us blown away, but didn't want to suffer the consequences. They're scared like that. We squids must have struck fear into their hearts with the first blow, because they're taking major efforts to maintain plausible deniability.

It's like a taut espionage thriller. Follow along&#8230;

First, from Kipp's project:



primetime76 said:


> Only 10 slots, you ask? Yes, only 10...


Hmmm&#8230; now where have we seen another assertion that there will be 10 bombs heading to squids??



Danfish98 said:


> &#8230;so that makes 10 in all. Some OG Squid mailboxes are gonna be f*cked up!


That's right. In Dan's sneak attack on the Squid OGs.

And who was behind this attack? Dan, obviously. But who was behind Dan?



WyldKnyght said:


> Damn you Dan, you get in hear get us all going against out leaders and then join the LOB.... :





ouirknotamuzd said:


> ..he was always on our side...but,he got tired of the smell of Squids so he has decided to resume his rightful place among the LOB as the biggest,baddest shark in the 7 seas.


The Lobsters were behind Dan. But&#8230; are the Lobsters really Lobsters? Or just silly, evil pawns serving the ZK empire?

Exhibit #1: 
The frequent references to the ZK teaming up with the LOB:



primetime76 said:


> we all look forward to teaming up with the Legion of Boom in the very near future!!





Oldmso54 said:


> Looking forward to some dual bombing adventures with you guys...





ouirknotamuzd said:


> I'm sure the ZK and the Legion will have many happy bombing excursions together in the future


Exhibit #2: 
Matt's assertion that the ZK and LOB are equal, something a ZK would never say about another bombing group:


socalocmatt said:


> ZK, LOB
> Every other group who is, in fact, less superior


Exhibit #3:
Who's kissed more llama ass than anyone? That's right Zenom.

And who's the newest member of the Lobster crew? That's right. Zenom.

Exhibit #4:
In various places, Shawn referenced a "personal thank you" to Ian and Pete. For example, in the thread about Pete's hit on me:



Oldmso54 said:


> Nice Pete (don't know if anyone see's a trend here or not but I'm just gonna say now = this is a personal "Thank you" from me)


In other words, the first attacks on squids from the Lobsters were directly the cause of the Lobster's association with known ZK old guy Shawn.

So&#8230;. We destroy a ZK. That ZK seeks personal revenge and hires two "mercenaries" so as not to have the action linked directly to the ZK. Said mercenaries then recruit a Squid to join them, as well as known associates of the ZK, but all the while maintaining that they are not, in fact, ZK. The ZK acknowledges the mercenaries abilities and expresses desire to work closely with them, all the while denying that they are one and the same.

And in the end, the ZK threatens 10 bombs, and the Squids are facing 10 bombs.

Conspiracy? Coincidence?

You decide&#8230;

Me? I think Dan's a llama! And behind him, is a lobster llama. And behind that lobster llama is a ZK llama!

But don't take my word for it. Here's photographic evidence!










:biglaugh:


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## Rock31 (Sep 30, 2010)

whhhhhhhhhhat are you smoking?


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

Rock31 said:


> whhhhhhhhhhat are you smoking?


Something from Pete. SEE?!?! MORE CONSPIRACY!!!

...actually, it was just an elaborate excuse to post that llama photo again.


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## Rock31 (Sep 30, 2010)

Pete is like a secret cult leader...he leads people to do as he says....next thing you know you will all be running around with needles in your face!


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## the_brain (May 1, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> And in the end, the ZK threatens 10 bombs, and the Squids are facing 10 bombs.


Well written, but two issues with your theory...

First, we have fully broken from the ZK and been kicked out of the boardroom.

Secondly, you were quoting us without referencing the context. We will assist the ZK in bombing, (as we would also assist the squids) if the bombing was for the right reasons. (for the troops, etc)

So, now you have 10 coming your way (eventually from what I gather) from the ZK, *but I have more then that landing on squids TODAY!!!*


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## Danfish98 (Jun 5, 2011)

Unfortunately it won't let me give out RG to you at the moment Derek, but that was one of the funniest posts I've read in a long time. I can assure you that I'm not a llama. I am, however, a LOBster and in the end, that's far worse for your mailbox :evil:


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

:shock:

Lobster and llama even start with the same letter! How did I not see this before?!




:smoke:


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## bigslowrock (May 9, 2010)

so 2+2 = 5?


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## Danfish98 (Jun 5, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> :shock:
> 
> Lobster and llama even start with the same letter! How did I not see this before?!
> 
> :smoke:


So do stupid and squid...


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## Oldmso54 (Jul 31, 2010)

I think Derek has waaaayyyy too much time on his hands ......


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## szyzk (Nov 27, 2010)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> :shock:
> 
> Lobster and llama even start with the same letter! How did I not see this before?!
> 
> :smoke:


Hmmm... Lobster... aninjaforallseasons... aninjaf*OR*a*L*l*SE*asons... Almost all the letters in "lobster" are in your name, just "B" and "T" are missing... B and T... Bombing Treachery!

Llama... aninjaforallseasons... *A*ninj*A*fora*LL*seasons... Only thing missing is an "M"... M... Motive...

So, we have a "motive" for "bombing treachery"?

Wait... WAITAMINUTE!!!

aninjaf*OR*a*L*l*SE*asons... *A*ninj*A*fora*LL*seasons... *ORLSE+AALL*... "The *O*rder of the *R*evolting *L*lama-*S*quids *E*ventually *A*cknowledges *A* *L*obster *L*eague"!

HOW FAR REACHING IS THIS CONSPIRACY??? DO THE SQUIDS EVEN EXIST??? HAS THIS ALL BEEN AN ELABORATE HOAX TO DIVERT US FROM THE _REAL TRUTH_???


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## Oldmso54 (Jul 31, 2010)

the_brain said:


> Well written, but two issues with your theory...
> 
> First, *we have* fully broken from the ZK and *been kicked out of the boardroom.*
> 
> ...


Well - that's a wee bit harsh... admittedly it's a private boardroom for a reason, and certainly none of us (well maybe except Dan) are in anyone else's boardroom, but youse guys (that's for Pete) will always be our (at least my) brothers, if not in our boardroom. :thumb:


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## the_brain (May 1, 2011)

szyzk said:


> Hmmm... Lobster... aninjaforallseasons... aninjaf*OR*a*L*l*SE*asons... Almost all the letters in "lobster" are in your name, just "B" and "T" are missing... B and T... Bombing Treachery!
> 
> Llama... aninjaforallseasons... *A*ninj*A*fora*LL*seasons... Only thing missing is an "M"... M... Motive...
> 
> ...


Man, that hurts even my brain, it is like the bible code junk all over again...


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> :shock:
> 
> Lobster and llama even start with the same letter! How did I not see this before?!
> 
> :smoke:


which also strikes me as funny,Sir,since you yourself were the very same ninja who coined both the monikers"llama" and "LOBster"

everything is going according as we planned,only better....we don't have to cut the head off of the Squids...it's going to EXPLODE!!!!

and one thing about us LOBsters and Llamas...we love a good explosion.

after we break the Ninja to the point that he's drooling like baby looking at Katy Perry's milk jugs,the rest of the Squids will crumble like a stack of soggy waffles,and the Legion of BOOM! will be there to snack on all that Squid meat.

Oh..and the Llamas can have the rest after we're done....we're nice like that.

don't forget about the guy with the rifle in the book depository,Ninja-boy..is he a LOBster or a Llama?

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

szyzk said:


> Hmmm... Lobster... aninjaforallseasons... aninjaf*OR*a*L*l*SE*asons... Almost all the letters in "lobster" are in your name, just "B" and "T" are missing... B and T... Bombing Treachery!
> 
> Llama... aninjaforallseasons... *A*ninj*A*fora*LL*seasons... Only thing missing is an "M"... M... Motive...
> 
> ...


I think Andrew is the one with too much time on his hands,Shawn

maybe you should try some arts and crafts,Bub..my secret arts and crafts center for old people and orphans is having a pottery class next week,Bub..maybe you could make yerself a nice ashtray.


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## szyzk (Nov 27, 2010)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> ...to snack on all that Squid meat.


I like mine fried with a little fresh lemon squeezed over it!


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## Oldmso54 (Jul 31, 2010)

ROTFLMAO - maybe one with some little devil horns - LOL

Oh wait... I like Andrew - oops sorry... that's my CREDIT CARD COMPANY that likes Andrew so much!


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## szyzk (Nov 27, 2010)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> I think Andrew is the one with too much time on his hands,Shawn
> 
> maybe you should try some arts and crafts,Bub..my secret arts and crafts center for old people and orphans is having a pottery class next week,Bub..maybe you could make yerself a nice ashtray.


You're just blind to the TRUTH!!!

What time's the class? I don't need an ashtray but I could use a nice butter dish.


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> after we break the Ninja


What do you mean, "after we break"? That's in the future! You mean "Now that weve broke", right? Right?!


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## the_brain (May 1, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> What do you mean, "after we break"? That's in the future! You mean "Now that weve broke", right? Right?!


*Pinky:* LOL, LOL, LOL, Narf!

*Brain:* More to come...


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## sweater88 (Jul 31, 2011)

I recieved my bombs from some of the Lobsters today....and I have to say that I think Derek is 100% correct....

Pete, has been saying the squids will be broken bla bla bla since we first attacked Shawn....

It is my belief, that the newly formed LOB is merely a "ghost corporation" and all non ZK members of this group will soon be made a fool of...


Squids...Do not fall for this, you must not listen to these evil geniouses...this is a jedi mind trick...hold steady and do not be weak minded! Treachery is abound, and we must stand true...don not give yourselves over to a group that answers to self proclaimed supreme leaders....


now I'm going to go post the awsome sticks those guys hit me with today:thumb:


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## socalocmatt (Dec 22, 2010)

Rock31 said:


> whhhhhhhhhhat are you smoking?


Simple answer: Crack

Probably David's crack.


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## szyzk (Nov 27, 2010)

Oldmso54 said:


> ROTFLMAO - maybe one with some little devil horns - LOL
> 
> Oh wait... I like Andrew - oops sorry... that's my CREDIT CARD COMPANY that likes Andrew so much!


I appreciate the kind words, Shawn, but DON'T BELIEVE WHAT THEY'RE TELLING YOU! It's a conspiracy, man!


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## Marlboro Cigars-cl (Feb 19, 2007)

:r.


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> What do you mean, "after we break"? That's in the future! You mean "Now that weve broke", right? Right?!


hello no,Dude.....we've done our homework about Ninja mental conditioning....what the LOBsters have done are merely put a few cracks in the china plate......we'll keep making the cracks bigger until the plate shatters on it's own.....

the LOB aren't barbarians....we're craftsmen...we're not gonna break you with a sladgehammer....we'll just tap..tap..tap...and the all the King's horsemen and all the King's men,won't be able to put Ninja back together again.

MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA


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## StogieNinja (Jul 29, 2009)

ouirknotamuzd said:


> hello no,Dude.....we've done our homework about Ninja mental conditioning....what the LOBsters have done are merely put a few cracks in the china plate......we'll keep making the cracks bigger until the plate shatters on it's own.....
> 
> the LOB aren't barbarians....we're craftsmen...we're not gonna break you with a sladgehammer....we'll just tap..tap..tap...and the all the King's horsemen and all the King's men,won't be able to put Ninja back together again.
> 
> MUWAHAHAHAHAHAHA


Keep making cracks bigger?!

You've send _three_ bombs. This _week_. Three!
Ian sent me a _lockbox_. _In_ a _lockbox_!

I don't know how much bigger the cr....

...heywaitaminute! This is exactly what you want! You want me to succumb to the pressure! Well _this_ Ninja ain't fallin' for it! _This_ ninja ain't bucking. This Ninja ain't folding.

This Ninja ain't gonna crack!
This Ninja's gonna kick back!!!


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## ouirknotamuzd (Jan 29, 2011)

Aninjaforallseasons said:


> Keep making cracks bigger?!
> 
> You've send _three_ bombs. This _week_. Three!
> Ian sent me a _lockbox_. _In_ a _lockbox_!
> ...


we expect you to kick back,little ninja squid buddy...we simply recommend that you don't make the cracks any bigger with any sudden movements....


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