Geraldo: So Bloof, I hear you're a Puerto Rican Jew, just like me.
Bloofington: Yes, as a matter of fact, up until you became famous, no one ever heard of Puerto Rican Jews before. After you were on Eyewitness News for a while, I didn't feel so lonely any more.
Geraldo: Sounds like the groundwork for a song. Meet me in my trailer later. I know people in the music business. We can have a cigar together. By the way, speaking of cigars, what's that you're smoking now?
Bloofington: The Cigar.
Geraldo: Right. Ladies and gentlemen, even though Bloofington is standing right next to me, I believe we have a failure to communicate. So again, Sir Bloofington, what kind of cigar is that you're smoking?
Bloofington: Right.
Geraldo: What? Are you toying with me? Although you may be a Puerto Rican Jew, as I am, I'm 12 years older than you, and therefore worthy of your respect, even if I have made a jackass out of myself at times during my 35 year career in the news business.
Bloofington: Well, I've put in well over five years of making a jackass, and a complete asinine fool out of myself on two different web sites. I'm known as far away as Asia!!!
Geraldo: That's great, we're essentially comparing egos here, and I don't think anyone would dispute mine's bigger than yours. So, ONCE AGAIN BLOOF, what kind of cigar is that you're smoking? The cigar in your hand.
Bloofington: As for the cigar, EXACTLY, and FINALLY you get it. As for what you've got that's bigger than mine, let's go over that again??? :dunno:
Geraldo: HEY, you're making me mad, right here on live television. WHAT the heck is it you're saying I've FINALLY got, I'VE GOT NOTHING!!! I've asked you umpteen times now about the cigar in your hand, and you've told me nothing!!!
:argh: :argh: :grumble: :argh:
Bloofington: EXACTLY!!! YOU FINALLY GET IT TWO TIMES NOW!!! Who's toying with who here, anyway???
:dunno: :duh: :dunno: :duh:
Geraldo: I give up, back to our studios in New York. You were right about one thing, Bloof. Your Jackass Gene is bigger than mine.
Bloofington: Told you. And by the way, that thing in my hand is called, . . .
The Cigar By Nick Perdomo, . . .
get it???
:duh: :duh: :duh:
Geraldo: :roll: :roll: :roll: Figures he would wait until we're off the air to tell me the whole story.