2 Blond Girl (G)

Two blonde girls were working for the city public works department.
One would dig a hole and the other would follow behind her and fill the hole in.
They worked up one side of the street, then down the other, then
moved on to the next street, working furiously all day without rest, one girl digging a hole, the other girl filling it in again.

An onlooker was amazed at their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.
So he asked the hole digger, "I'm impressed by the effort you
two are putting into your work, but I don't get it -- why do you
dig a hole, only to have your partner follow behind and fill it up again?"
The hole digger wiped her brow and sighed, "Well, I suppose it
probably looks odd because we're normally a three-person team. But today the girl who plants the trees called in sick."

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he
would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises.

My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing? I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was
"CRAZY" and give me a few days off.A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked "What are you doing?"

I told him I was a light bulb. He said "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days". I jumped down and walked out of the office. When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her" ...And where do you think you're going?"

(You're gonna love this.....)


She said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark!"

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
talking........and one blonde says to the other:
"Which do you think is farther away..........Florida
or the moon?"
"The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see
Florida.......?????"

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CAR TROUBLE

A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station.
She tells the mechanic it died.
After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says,"What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks,"How often do I have to do that?"

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SPEEDING TICKET

A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very
nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act
together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you
expect me to show it to you!"

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RIVER WALK

There's this blonde out for a walk.
She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite
bank.
"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts,
"How can I get to the other side?
" The second blonde looks up the river then down the
river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

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KNITTING

A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the
freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the
blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and
siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his
bullhorn and yelled , "PULL OVER!"
"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

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BLONDE ON THE SUN

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
The American said, "We were the first on the moon!
" The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the
sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook
their heads.
"You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!"
said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know.
We're going at night!"

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IN A VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night.
It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science &
Nature.
Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your
name, can you hear it?"
She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

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FINALLY,



A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new
dogs, and asked her what their names were.
The blonde responded by saying that one was named Rolex and one
was named Timex.
Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like
that?"
"Helloooo," answered the blond.-"They're watch dogs!"